I was recently having a conversation with a friend where he was doing just that. It was interesting to me because I can definitely remember times where I've done it too. I've initially resisted the paths that I would end up taking, because they felt either too hard or too easy. Yes, you read that right, too easy and it would seem that I am not the only one who does this.
Do you ever feel too old? When was the point in our lives when we became too old for stuff? It seems like a blurry memory of some point in my mid 20's when I felt like it for the first time. When you've transitioned into being a proper grown up, you're supposed to have it together, earn respect and NOT FAIL OR LOOK STUPID!
The next time you find yourself struck with self-doubt its worth bearing in mind that when you doubt your power, you give power to your doubt. In every moment we have a choice to believe in ourselves or to believe in our doubts, one moves us closer to our goals and one moves us further away, which option will you choose?
So I want more kindness in my life, where do I start? Well, counter-intuitively authentic kindness starts with being kind to yourself. Sure you can just go out and do good or volunteer but if you're judging yourself harshly or not forgiving yourself for past mistakes then any act of kindness will be conditional, the real incentive will be to make you feel better about yourself.
Here's another crap misconception. That it's egotistical to love yourself. I was accused of loving myself at school, far from the sad truth that I had a lot of healing to do before I was to understand what it meant to love myself. Now I realise it's something that people say to others when they are threatened by someone's confidence as it reminds them of what little acceptance they have for themselves... I see beauty all around me, in people, places, objects and actions. That's love and it's a very powerful thing!
Stop yourself right there. Don't let yourself go down into a spiral of negativity as the deeper you go, the harder it will be to get out. Stop yourself before you even start on that downwards path. You know you're working hard and you're getting things done. You just struggle to get them done in the amount of time you'd like to get them done in.