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Noel Gallagher

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Tales From the Middle of Nowhere (Vol. 2): The Next One Was Fully Booked Leaving Me Stranded!

Posted: 02/05/2012 16:53

Yes comrades, it's been a while eh? Lots to tell so let's go all the way back to Vegas.
That day was a fucking nightmare. Iree Nancy and our 2 princes had arrived in Los Angeles for a little holiday so I decided to fly to Vegas on the day of the gig. Not something one would ordinarily do as it can be fraught with danger. So... got to the airport on time, checked in and all that, sat around for two bastard hours until some cunt announced that the flight had been cancelled!!

Not to worry though thought I, we still have plenty of time. We'll just get the next one... can't we?? Nah... the next one was fully booked leaving me stranded!! Had to negotiate trying to get my bags OFF the airplane that had been cancelled only to be told that they'd already been booked on to the flight after that!!! So... had to leave my bags at LAX and hire a car to drive me SIX BASTARD HOURS through the desert to try and make the gig! The scenery was incredible and I did get to stop at a Burger King (I ain't been in one of those joints for YEARS!) which was nice... don't tell the wife though!

Was supposed to be onstage at 9pm. Didn't arrive until 9:35. Walked straight in and onstage at 9:40!! Felt like Elvis... that may have been the burger though?!?! Great gig. Lots of Brits, so it was a good laugh. There was a few roly-polys in from Yorkshire. I know that because they kept chanting "YORKSHIRE,YORKSHIRE..." at every available opportunity. I bet their ex-wives would've been most proud!!!

Up early the next morning to drive six hours the other way back to the Coachella Festival again. They have it on twice now see? By the time we got there it was 114 degrees!!!!!! ONE HUNDRED AND FOURTEEN DEGREES!!!!!!! Holy fucking shit balls?

The gig went pretty much the same as the previous weekend. The night itself followed pretty much the same pattern. Not as chaotic but right up there all the same.

Drove back to LA the next day not feeling great. Spent the day discussing what we could remember about the night before which in my case was virtually nothing. Good job Nancy had her shit together or it could well have been consigned to the dustbin.

The next day I had a video shoot for my new single. That'll be the fifth off this album which is unprecedented in all my time making records. This album is fast becoming my Thriller!! I played the part of a slightly hungover grumpy northern taxi driver which is just as well as that's exactly what I felt like. I feel it's some of my best work and most definitely worthy of at least one Bafta. That actress Mischa Barton was in it too. Nice girl. City fan would you believe!?!?

You currently find me in Sao Paolo in the great nation of Brazil. Been on holiday the last week. In a place called Laguna Beach. Paradise. Home of the most over-rated band in all of music... The Beach Boys. Nice gaff though.

ONWARDS.

GD.

 

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08:10 on 07/05/2012
About world policy: vote against EDL, so that we can get more votes than the 67.54% who are for the EDL.
Thank you.
00:11 on 03/05/2012
Beach Boys overrated?

Let's hear some of Oasis's or Noel's four part harmonies,..... a capella please.

(crickets)

Yeah, exactly.
Get back to name-dropping and ripping off the Beatles now...
02:40 on 03/05/2012
Go listen to Who Feels Love.
03:42 on 03/05/2012
If you've heard one Oasis song (or Noel song) you've heard them all.
The dude recycles HIMSELF.
Talk about overrated!

(This is where some irate Oasis fanboy talks about how many CDs/songs he has sold...as if that is any measure of quality.)
21:50 on 02/05/2012
Love ya Noel. If you are reading this..I love the Beach Boys first 3 or 4 albums. I don't get the rest of the stuff so I know what ya mean. Ps. I thought they were from Hawthorne?
19:37 on 02/05/2012
Not again!

One of the most annoying people in the world. He thinks he's cool, different, hip or whatever but he comes accross as a total muppet!
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19:31 on 02/05/2012
Hehe Noel.... 114 degrees must have been a lotta fun.

Whaddya mean currently on vacation? You are ALWAYS on vacation. you wouldn't know what a day of work was if it bit you on your limey buttocks!
19:18 on 02/05/2012
I would say that Mr. Gallagher is the most overrated person in music, but even critics have caught on as of late. The only thing high flying about his new records are the zzzzzzz's it invokes from the listener.
18:20 on 02/05/2012
The language in this article was not at all necessary! It was awful!!
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17:30 on 02/05/2012
We live in Denver, but have adopted Laguna as our vacation home away from home - good read from one of the greats in pop music. Appreciate your candor, Noel.