As the Summer draws in and we reflect upon the fantastic weather and summer activity..oh no.. wait... we reflect upon the holidays we had to go on for fantastic weather and summer activity, I start to look through my Facebook timeline and see a disturbingly familiar pattern. Clubbing holiday posing bikini shots, now this may more be a reflection on the social networking friends I keep, than my generation, but they do seem to be EVERYWHERE.
There are several points to discuss here, the first being the levels of hair and make up worn and the levels of 'sucking in' being executed when your meant to on a beach 'relaxing'. For me the beach is for a bare-faced (even if I do regularly get mistaken for a young Swedish boy), bloated tummy, squint reading delightfulness, not for making myself seem more attractive to the 17 leering lads playing frisby. I'm all for holiday romances and new destinations creating the opportunity to meet new potential partners, but these type of holidays really do breed a 'pack on pack' mating mentality. If I naturally stumble across a mildly attractive Italian waiter on a cobbled street whilst purchasing a white chocolate magnum then 'joy', but a lad trying to thrust his champagne magnum down my throat, no thanks.
Secondly, the London-based 'pre and post *insert holiday destination* club nights' - we all know you all went there in a mass exodus together to see your friends/partners FROM London. Whatever happened to going away to sample new cuisine, explore a different culture and learn something new about yourself? Instead let me lie on a sun lounger surrounded by people from my hometown, cowering from the sun in fear of make up drippage and argue with my ex boyfriend because he's here with the girl from down the road.
One of the most disturbing elements of these trips is the 'devil may care' attitude to starvation and casual sex shown through tweets and slogans such as 'No carbs before Marbs' ,'What happens in ?? stays in ??' 'Hols = totes excuse to be a slag' 'here we come, leave your dignity in London'. Now leaving the obvious safety issues and sexual health matters aside, where is your self respect? Don't get me wrong I'm all for letting your hair down once in a while, but to actively spend your well earned cash to go on a holiday where all you want to do is have sex with strangers and add a few notches to your bed post is absurd. Lest we forget the obvious flaw that you will probably know 90% of the other revellers from home!
Lastly, 'champagne spray parties', now can someone please tell me where the fun is in this? Sticky, bubbly and darn expensive liquid being poured over my head, whilst I'm supposed to play fight and giggle at the pleasure for you doing so? Holiday goers I implore to give the amount of money you are spending pouring champagne into the drains of Spanish swimming pools to a worthwhile charity or your local community centre. I can assure the benefits of this far outweigh getting that phone number or holiday 'quickie' you received instead.
P.S. I went on a wonderfully relaxing holiday with my parents, where I played carpet bowls and ate like a hog, followed by a site seeing trip to Rome, where I learnt alot, walked alot and ate like a hog.
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