Cutlass, check. Wooden leg, check. Parrot, check. With any luck you’ll have remembered it’s International Talk Like A Pirate Day and you'll be dressed in your finest swashbuckling attire.
This raucously fun yearly event sees landlubbers across the globe down tools, dress like extras from Treasure Island and yell indecipherable salty sea dog phrases in each other's faces.
It’s not enough to look the part though, you’ll have to brush up on high seas jargon too… which is where we step in with these handy tips and phrases:
Did you know? Talk Like A Pirate Day is indebted to Robert Newton's portrayal of Long John Silver in Disney's Treasure Island
While the basics - Ahoy! Avast! Aye!, Aye aye! and Arrr! - are pretty easy to master, the founders of International Talk Like A Pirate Day have compiled a handy "how to" guide (with French, Dutch and German translations).
Just remember to always observe these simple rules:
Double up on all your adjectives and you'll be bountifully bombastic with your phrasing. Pirates never speak of "a big ship", they call it a "great, grand ship!" They never say "never", they say "No nay ne'er!"
Drop all your "g"'s when you speak and you'll get words like "rowin'", "sailin'" and "fightin'". Dropping all of your "v"'s will get you words like "ne'er", "e'er" and "o'er".
Instead of saying "I am", sailors say, "I be". Instead of saying "You are", sailors say, "You be". Instead of saying, "They are", sailors say, "They be". Ne'er speak in anythin' but the present tense!
HuffPost UK is proud to enjoy a special friendship with Capn’ Slappy, who exclusively sheds light on why he is steering this day into its 11th year.
He explains: “Part of my passion for this particularly silly event is my long-held belief that the world needs a healthy dose of ‘silly’ in generous portions from time to time.
“This is just how Ol' Chumbucket and meself make that contribution on an annual basis. It's hard to harbour hatred for your fellow human beings whilst bellowing, ‘YARRR! Great Neptune's Salty Man-Nipples!
"I'll be hornswoggled for a Dutchman's potty!’ (And as a pirate, you get to make up interesting albeit nonsensical phrases like, ‘Dutchman's potty’ or ‘Great Neptune's Salty Man-Nipples!’ and as long as you growl it at the top o' yer voice, everyone just knows you're talkin' ‘pirate')."
Scroll down for a gallery of pirate chat-up lines
Do as they say or you'll walk the plank: Capn' Slappy (left) and Ol' Chumbucket
Though the event is globally successful, US-based Capn’ Slappy informs us the city with the most visitors to his official Facebook page is… London.
And while Johnny Depp and Errol Flynn fly the skull and crossbones flag for the United States, the ever-humble Slappy is also mindful of the British influence, nay, essence of the event.
Referring of course to Robert Newton’s rolling-eyed portrayal of Long John Silver in the Walt Disney version of Treasure Island, our favourite buccaneer adds: “It was Newton’s thick Cornish accent that became the iconic voice of ‘Pirate Talk’.
“Like so many gifts to the world, this one comes courtesy of an accidental Anglo-American collaboration.”
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