In aid of Mental Health Awareness week, I would really like to address the stages that new mothers go through when first entering motherhood (I'm speaking from my personal experience.)
At first we are so elated that we have been able to bring a new life into the world - we are in shock that we are now cradling someone that has been inside us for nine months and we have finally, by the grace of God been able to meet them!
For a split second, internally you're asking yourself 'So what do I do now?'
You see - sometimes we get so focused on the pregnancy that we don't think about the raising of the child until it comes out!
This where you begin to get overwhelmed and start to second guess your ability on being a mother.
The next stage is now wondering and questioning if we can actually do this whole motherhood thing - the constant nappy changes, the wall to wall crying, the sleepless nights, not knowing what to do when the baby is crying amongst a million of other things. We then flashback to when they were just in our bellies and we would marvel when we would feel a hiccup or a kick, and reality still hasn't really kicked in that this baby belongs to us.
After the first maybe three months we can see that our child is growing, very healthy and meeting all the development milestones, but we get to a point where we start to subconsciously compare our child to the many children that we see when we go out everyday - 'Why does this child look bigger than mine?', 'That baby is already holding things, but what about my child?'. We ask ourselves so many questions and begin to doubt our ability to be a mother, but we forget to take into consideration that every child is different and their rate of developing will also be different.
In our quiet time we go over so many things in our mind in regards to our children, how we should raise them, what we want to do for them to have the best and what takes the cake is the fact no one will truly understand what we are going through internally because we will never express it fully.
This is where I wanted to truly get to.
New mothers, or mothers that have been mothers for a very long time - there is so much that we think about, but we don't really say. Even the mothers that have partner, there is a little part of them that still feels alone, not to say they're not getting the help and support that they need, but there's an understanding that we yearn for to help us feel more at ease and for basic reassurance
This is why having a support group is great - you not only unload your worries and concerns, but you also encourage others and let them know they are not the only ones going through something alone. It's so important, especially when you are new mother.
It's so easy to dip into post-partum depression without realizing, and before we know it we're in and don't have a way of getting out.
To all of the mothers out there - this was just on my heart, because I too am a new mother, still grasping this motherhood life and all that it entails, but what has seen me through is having a constant group of support that I can go to if I have any worries on my mind, or if I feel a little overwhelmed with it all.
Do not be afraid to share what is on your mind and on your hearts, as you open up, you also give way for everyone else to open up and before you realize, you have poured out of all of your burdens and concerns and your mind is clear!
Don't keep it bottled up, speak up and let your mind be free - do not forget you are raising a small person that will be looking up to you!Suggest a correction