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This Is What Happens 60 Seconds After Your Kid Drinks Some 'Healthy' Orange Juice

25/11/2016 12:21

2016-11-17-1479394719-1596162-whathappensafteryourkidsdrinkfruitjuice.jpg
Source: Posh Tiger

Sometimes your little one looks you in the eye and begs and screams for some 'juice' mummy!!

Whenever did juice become such a sacred drink in a child's eye?

I can't remember it in mine - but I do remember loving tooth-rotting drinks at school and the odd boy who burped and you received a whiff of blackcurrant.

But now, there are so many to choose from and each one claims to be 'natural', preservative-free, gluten-free, or contains no added trans fats.

I'm sure with my two I've tried every single drink on the market - each one promising to be a nutritious treat - making me feel like someone would call child line if I didn't get give them at least one juice a day.

And not matter what happens, no matter the brand or the colour - there is definitely something that happens to a child when, worn out - you succumb to their wish and grant them - THE JUICE!

From my own complex scientific experiments on 2 children (equally split between a boy and a girl, to eradicate any bias), I've observed the following that happens 60 minutes after your kids drink some 'healthy juice':

After 10 Minutes
Their eyes prize wide open like a crazed monster and they start looking around the room for something to throw or smash. Only heavy and dangerous objects will do!

After 15 Minutes
They run towards the nearest item with outstretched arms and their mouth wide open, shouting a strange war cry at the top of their voice. They then change their mind at the last second, turn around and kick the nearest adult in the crotch.

After 20 Minutes
The child has decided running and jumping is the MOST FUN THING IN THE WORLD EVER! They will now run around the house, up and down the stairs throwing anything that's in their way up into the air.

After 30 Minutes
The initial energy rush is beginning to subside so the child may choose to stay in one room rather than around the entire house. But, they're not done yet. They start trying to whistle (they've never done this before). The noise is loud and not good - dogs and cats around the neighbourhood start to howl.

After 40 Minutes
The juiced up toddler has given up on whistling and is now screeching at the top of their voice instead. The sound is unbearable but they are so noisy they can't hear you when you ask them, nicely and politely, to stop that racket!

After 50 Minutes
The sugar rush is almost gone and they begin to crave more juice, even though they know it's one juice a day and only water thereafter. They shout "NO!" loudly when you hand them a cup of water and then attempt to throw the water at you. They see the look of fear on your face and laugh like a maniac. For 5. Whole. Minutes.

After 60 Minutes
They dissolve into tears, begging for 'cuddles mummy/daddy/grandma'. You give them a cuddle and hand them the cup of water again which they drink slowly, in between crying hiccoughs. You enjoy this lovely cuddle but remind yourself never to let them down an entire cup/carton of juice unsupervised again!

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