Are you feeling less confident lately? Do you have days when you are more confident than on other days? You are not alone. We all those days when we feel that nothing we do is good enough, nothing we do is right and we feel unable to tackle new tasks without feeling apprehensive.
I have those days too. Most of the time I can get on with my work and my days flow past in a positive way, and I feel confident in what I am doing and the results I am achieving. I also have other days when I feel totally unconfident in my abilities. But I do have some strategies to help.
One of the most well known confidence building exercises is to list your own strengths and natural abilities. By looking at the list it can make you say, "Wow, I really am good!"
Another great way of building your confidence and getting in touch with how great you really are is to ask friends, colleagues and people who you know for feedback on your strengths and natural abilities.
As a practical exercise list 5 people who you know and trust. Make sure they are from different areas of your life.
• A family member
• A friend
• A work colleague
• An associate
• A social contact
You might at this stage be feeling a little nervous about asking these people for feedback. Don't worry, because you will be only asking for your strengths.
Just go for it!
So, how do you go about it? Well, below is a list of questions that I'd like you to ask to each person on your list.
I recommend that you explain the context of the exercise however you feel is best and then email them the questions so they can email their feedback to you.
1. What do you perceive to be my greatest strengths?
2. What do you like most about me?
3. What do you value most about me?
4. What three words sum up the positive points about me?
5. If you needed help with something, what would you call me to help you with?
They will feel honoured that you have asked them and the feedback that you will receive will truly make you feel fabulous and full of confidence. Rightly or wrongly, we live in a society where other peoples' opinions count to our self esteem and confidence. By completing this exercise you will get some really good insight into some of your strengths.
Often you receive valuable information on the strengths that you didn't even know you had!
After you have received all of the feedback it is now time to reflect on what has been written or said:
• How do you feel about it?
• Are there any surprises?
• Do you feel confident about your abilities?
• How can you use this information going forward?
• How can you maximise your strengths?
If these people think you have these strengths, so do a lot of other people as well - how does that make you feel?
• What are the key insights you have learned?
• What will you do now that is different from what you have done before?
• How much more confident in your abilities do you feel?