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Why Watching the World Cup With an American Sucks

03/07/2014 15:53 BST | Updated 02/09/2014 10:59 BST

I got into the World Cup this year. I don't particularly like football, or soccer as we would call it, but I definitely got into it.

A little background to my football knowledge. I used to play the sport when I was 13. One game, I was kept on the side line the whole 90 minutes. The coach didn't play me once. I went up to him and asked him why. 'Meredith, you're terrible. It's time to think of a new sport to play.' American school sports were largely based on A, B and C squads. Everyone made the A squad when they reached a certain age. I was the one rule breaker - I made the C squad year on year. My sister still to this day remembers the time I scored my one goal. It's a very important moment in my family to date. I wasn't good at soccer, I gave it up, and I never watched it again.

However, when I got wind that USA were doing well, I tuned in. I tuned in and watched it with my English friends. It might just be the last time they tune in with me.

I cheered during replays thinking it was live television. I screamed 'come on America' most definitely 900 times throughout the duration of the game. I made it very clear of my feelings of how England is terrible at the sport and we are better than you. I asked silly questions about the penalty shootout, wondering when people are going into shoot off (apparently in this spectator sport you don't all pull your guns out and start shooting each other. Apparently it's called a shootout, not a shoot off. Lesson learnt). I kept on saying that the men on the pitch are all silly men. I screamed - really, really, really loud. And couldn't understand why these people weren't scoring goals.

The game ended and even though we lost, I carried on. 'As it turns out, America is the best at everything. This World Cup is going to revolutionise the way soccer is seen in America, in fact, I'm pretty sure you English people will start calling it soccer soon,' fell out of my mouth to anyone that would listen (which was a whopping no one).

I think I might be a huge exception to the rule. I am a little slow on the uptake when it comes to the game. It doesn't mean others aren't into soccer, my best friend Laura knows everything there is to know about the sport. She supports Tottenham, even though she is American and she had a countdown to the World Cup for the past year.

However, the one thing that every American possesses, and the one enduring quality that just won't go away is the love of their country, and the thought that no matter what - we are the best. We always will be the best, and it just so happens that this year, even though we didn't make it to the quarter finals, we still seemed to be the best in, quite frankly, a sport that we aren't very good at.

The next day I asked my sister what she thought (she still lives in America). I text her saying 'What a game,' she text back saying 'Yeah'. I text her saying, 'Aren't you somewhat happy for us, even though we lost?' She text back saying, 'I mean, I am sort of over it now. It's time to focus on real sport. Like football' (that's American football to you English people).

And that's where it stands. America will always be a country that is patriotic, loves their country, loves their people, loves their sport (if they tackle each other), drinks beer and eats burgers.

And, what more, I'm pretty sure America will be best playing sport (American football and baseball), against each other too. I suspect it's because we wouldn't want to embarrass other people with our extraordinary capabilities. But in all honesty, I think it's because other people just can't take us as spectators. Americans are just too much to handle watching sports. I'll leave you with most definitely my favourite saying, GOD BLESS AMERICA MY HOME SWEET HOME.

(Side note - all of my articles are written in jest. If you take offense to what I write, maybe it's time you move to America. Where they don't get sarcasm.)