With the world's attention firmly on last week's United Nations Climate Conference in Paris - known as COP21 - it seems as though the EU has decided to take the downtime to create a Directive about something so serious and dangerous that you may find it hard to believe it hasn't already been done - the safety of candles.
No, this isn't a joke.
With raised terror threats around Europe, one of the worst migrant crises the world has ever seen and the Schengen Agreement at breaking point, the European Union found this was the right time to create one of its most pointless and absurd pieces of legislation yet.
Right on cue for Advent, the EU set out new rules in a 4-page document on the "standards for candles, candle supports, containers and accessories"!
Get Britain Out has discovered the regulations will dictate the legal height, stability and structural support for candles.
The Directive includes some top tips for both suppliers and buyers, such as "free-standing candles or candles supplied with a holder or container shall remain stable (e.g. not tip over) during burning," and "never leave a burning candle unattended."
Your candle is not allowed to fall over - genius! Why was this never put into practice before hand?
It even includes a section on emissions - right in time for the climate talks. It says "For indoor candles the emission of soot shall be minimised as far as possible with no visible release of soot." The European Union - saving the planet one candle at a time....
But at least we can all sleep well over the Christmas period knowing our candles will no longer spontaneously burst into flames. The candle legislation does say "the candle shall not ignite its support, container or accessories at any stage of the burning cycle." Well, that's a relief!
One more reason to Get Britain Out.Suggest a correction