You have heard him fart, masturbate and laugh at Adam Sandler movies. He has heard you fall in the shower, have conversations with inanimate objects and cry, while eating Ben&Jerry's directly from the freezer.
I know you're thinking: Why should I?
The answer is simple: Because it's easy! You're already living together! All you need is a ring and his last name, and you'll finally be a complete person.
But "how?" you are probably asking yourself. Well, with this simple and handy guide on How To Bag Your Roomie, you'll no longer need to worry.
Step 1: Background Check
First of all, it's important that you check that your roomie isn't in a relationship, gay, female, your relative or a serial killer. It's easy, just ask them the following questions:
If he answers NO to all of them, he's ready to be bagged..
Step 2: Fade To Relationship
Slowly let him get used to the lingo you'll be using, once you've bagged him. Casually slip it into sentences, that you usually use. (I've highlighted the keywords to make it easier)
Step 3: Igniting The Spark
Relationships often begin with a magic moment. Your hands touch, as you try to barricade the door to keep him from leaving the house and suddenly - you're in love.
They say you cannot force these moments - but I say, why not try?
Step 4: The Wedding
Now that he's all bag-able, you go all in. While he's out, you make these slight changes in your home:
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