08/03/2011 22:33 GMT | Updated 22/05/2015 10:12 BST

The Totally Honest Guide To Baby Names - Flowers

All credit to my mum for this week's Totally Honest Guide to Baby Names. She's an extraordinarily talented flower-arranger, and on my recent trip home she suggested we think about flower names.

My normal response to anyone suggesting names is to turn up the TV volume but a couple of names mum came up with are actually on our real list (first baby due December 1). I'd not made the connection with flowers though, believe it or not.

Such are our celebrity-crazed times that my first thoughts have been to the famous offspring with these names, rather than the famous natural world around me. I'd overlooked the fact that they didn't originate in the pages of Heat.

Flower names can be cool, but they can also be a bit tricksy. First off, there aren't that many options for boys (right now I can't think of any), and secondly they can mark your child out for a career in fashion PR, and nobody wants that.

It's also an idea to check that the flower you choose has positive connotations, and isn't nature's cyanide or the floral symbol of death and disaster, say. Not unless you're really warped, a 1960s Russian spy or a member of the Addams Family.

For fun, I've dropped in an idea here that has yet to make it from the flowerbed to the class register. Bet you can't tell which one.

For girls

- Favoured by poets and playwrights, especially Shakespeare.

Lily - Lily Allen has made this name very popular again.

Daisy - Model Daisy Lowe, daughter of Pearl Lowe and Supergrass's Danny Goffey, looks like she can handle herself.

Poppy - Synonymous with Van Gogh, Remembrance Day and the de Villeneuves. There do seem to be lots of flower names amongst rich families.

Iris - Greek name meaning rainbow. Great if you already have George and Zippy.

Blossom - Are there too many ponies in the world with this name?

Ivy - One of my mum's WI friends, though I'm not sure she's made into OK! yet. Only a matter of time, Ivy.

Ammi - Of North Eastern African origin, be careful not to confuse it with its close cousin, the roadside weed.

Laleh - Persian name meaning tulip.

Holly - Don't pick this for Christmas babies. That's just too obvious.

Jasmine - Jasmine Guinness has done well with it. Or it could be her fabulous wealth and natural beauty that's carrying her through. Dunno.

Amaryllis - Nice, but reminds me of Phylis. Means to sparkle.

Fern - Ferne Cotton might add a quirky extra 'e' but it still means leafy green plant. Boring.

Fleur - Means flower in French. Yes, really. Pronounced "how do you spell that?" in English.

Hyacinth - Go on, if your surname is Bucket, or better still Bouquet, you have to pick this one. No one will ever believe you had the balls.

Marigold - Named after the washing-up gloves.

Roisin - Irish diminutive form of Rose. There's nothing diminutive about Irish singer Roisin Murphy.

Violet - Too pretty a name for that bubble-gum-guzzling spoiled Beauregarde brat in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

For boys

Briar - Means prickly bush. Well, at least it's not a girls' name.

Celyn - Welsh name meaning holly.

Florian - Latin-ish for flower. And probably for "go on, punch me" too.