05/05/2011 15:52 BST | Updated 22/05/2015 10:12 BST

Strop Of The Week: Save The Fish!

Strop of the Week: Save the fish! PA

Strop Scene:

Tranquil river bank. Beautiful sunny spring day. Picnicing families aplenty. An abundance of offspring playing with fishing nets and buckets in the river.

Strop Cause:

Some poor unsuspecting nipper decided he wanted to keep his "catch" and take it home with him. Stropper unimpressed. Had been taught that all living things belong in their own environment. Ok to look but then should return them. Nice theory, now back-firing somewhat. Stropper displaying utter dimay at the thought of two sticklebacks and a miniscule shrimp being removed from their home and "their mummy and daddy".

Strop Symptoms:

Running frantically between me and the object of her consternation. Lots of sobbing and pleading with us both to free the fish. There was a certain amount of sympathy on my part for The Stropper trying its best to single-handedly save the pond life of Britain. But I also felt for the poor kid with a bucket full of pond life, their life hanging in the balance.

Dismay Factor Percentage:

Numerous parents staring at me and The Stropper as if we were some crazy militant aquatic activists. The Stropper calmed down eventually after the stickleback was reluctantly returned to its right and proper place in life. Despite causing a definite rucus on what was an otherwise peaceful afternoon, I was ademantly proud of The Stropper.

Strop score: 43%