02/06/2011 08:19 BST | Updated 22/05/2015 06:12 BST

The Semi-Detached Parent: What Men Hate About Women. (Not That Much!)

The Semi-Detached Parent: What men hate about women. (Nothing) PA

So, to redress the balance a bit after last week's What I Hate About Men list, I decided to turn the tables and quiz all my male friends about what annoyed them about women.

I asked on my Facebook page just as I did for the other list. That time I had about 20 replies within seconds. The men, however, were less forthcoming...

Eventually, a few comments dribbled in. They were:

The incessant questioning and the need to know everything.

Once over the age of 35, the constant need to revisit the place they've just been to retrieve whatever it is they've forgotten.

Women who are obsessed by things like wedding dresses.

Nagging, especially telling me things I already know time and time again.

Not knowing how lucky they are to have breasts. Men often have to go online or plead for half an hour to see boobs. Women just have to look down.

Going to 20 different shops for six hours looking for a nice dress only to return to the first one and buy the first outfit she tried on.

Always needing to have a plan, be doing something, seeing someone.

The Only Way Is Essex. Without women, that wouldn't ever have existed.

Those mind boggling questions with no right answer such as "What annoys you about women?"

The ability to recall every word of an argument so they can play back and repeat x10 to you.


Hmmm. All a bit predictable, isn't it? Dresses, periods, boobs, nagging. No actual real complaints though, which suggests two things to me: 1) women are generally fairly easy to live with and 2) men have huge problems with communication and struggle to say what they are actually thinking. (Unless it is reacting to their shortcomings being pointed out...)

In other news, I have been invited to attend a seminar on how to 'Meet Mr Right'. In just two hours I will be trained in the necessary skills to snare the man of my dreams*. Obviously he will not be wearing a vest, ponytail or cheap shoes. And I will not nag him, talk about dresses or have my period. I will say nothing and just show him my breasts. Just how men like it.

*Last night I dreamed of Boycie from Only Fools and Horses. This might not work.

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