Shamed TV chef Antony Worrall Thompson has been an emotional wreck since he was caught shoplifting last week, admitting he "sobbed" himself to sleep following his shock arrest at a Tesco store.
He was reportedly spotted on CCTV leaving the shop without scanning a number of items, including wine and cheese, at the self-checkout and the 60 year old issued a grovelling apology on Monday after the incident was revealed in a national newspaper.
Now, he has opened up about his arrest, admitting he is horrified about the shame he has cast on his family - and has spent days crying about the incident.
"My children, who are 12 and 14, know. They've all been very supportive. Yes, I am worried what they think. Jay and I have brought up two fantastic kids and we're proud of them so I hope they see this as something I need to seek help for.
"It's not about me - it's about all the people who have believed in me including my family. I want to make it up to all of them.
"It's all been incredibly emotional. I've sobbed myself to sleep - not because I've been feeling sorry for myself. I'd never do that. It's just not knowing why I've done this and the feeling I've let people down. Will people look at me differently now? I don't know. I'm apologising to everyone. I've got to face up to what I've done and that means seeking help."
The star also pondered the reasons why he took the goods, explaining: "I've asked myself so many questions. Was it a cry for help? I have been under incredible stress. We've moved home which is stressful... but I can't really blame that. There have been other things, including the funerals of a couple of close friends. I've had health problems too and have given up smoking and I've been anaemic so I'm more tired than usual.
"The trouble with me is that I don't know how to relax. I find it very hard to chill out. I'm sure I bottle things up and something's just snapped. I just don't know what was going on in my head. It's like a little devil sitting at my shoulder or something.
"But it's a nonsense to me that I would do something like this - damage my family and damage my career. It really doesn't make any sense. Normally I'm a strong guy but something's made me snap and I just don't know what. I hope I can get over this with some help."
The chef is now seeking professional treatment.
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