13/11/2012 09:47 GMT | Updated 22/05/2015 06:12 BST

'Don't Tell Your Mother...': 20 All-Time Favourite Dad Phrases

'Don't tell your mother...': 20 all-time favourite dad phrases Alamy

When we're little boys, all we want is to be just like our dads – and then we we become dads ourselves and discover that we've turned into our fathers!

I had such a moment of realisation the other day as I dropped off my eight-year-old son at his friend's.

"Take your coat off, son...or you won't feel the benefit," I told him.

Then when I picked him up: "Tuck your vest in, son...or you'll get a bad back when you're older."

And on the way home: "Stand up straight, lad...or you'll end up round-shouldered."

So it was a relief to find that I'm no different to other dads who have a repertoire of 'Dad Phrases' that they use on a regular basis.

Classics such as, 'Do you think I'm made of money?', 'When I was your age' and 'He's thick as two short planks', all featured in a poll of 2,000 adults.

The survey uncovered the most common, sarcastic or funny sayings that dads come out with on a daily basis - with the top two both money-related.

'Money doesn't grow on trees', 'Were you raised in a barn?' and 'I'm not sleeping, I'm just resting my eyes', also featured in the top 10.


1. Do you think I'm made of money?

2. Money doesn't grow on trees

3. He's thick as two short planks

4. When I was your age ...

5. I'm not sleeping, I'm just resting my eyes

6. I'm not going to tell you again

7. Were you raised in a barn

8. Don't talk back to your mother

9. If you were told to jump off a cliff, would you?

10. They don't make them like they used to

11. Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about

12. Don't tell your mother

13. Waste not, want not

14. You're not going out in that

15. We were grateful to have an orange for Christmas

16. Now, don't go spending a lot on me

17. A little hard work never hurt anybody

18. You'll understand when you're older

19. You don't know you're born

20. Don't let the bedbugs bite

Do these ring a bell? What does your dad or partner always say?