14/08/2014 16:38 BST | Updated 22/05/2015 10:12 BST

Dating Rich People - Good, Clean, Short-Term Fun


Some of the best fun I've had is casually dating rich, spoiled men - hanging out with the offspring of successful people is everything you'd expect it to be.

With a mix of family wealth and the looks of their more attractive parent, these men have the confidence to do whatever the hell they like. You eat at fancy restaurants, you go on people's boats, you get flown to Paris for their Eton mate's art party. Lovely. Truthfully, I'll accept flights like rum and coke if I'm into the guy buying them. I'd recommend it.


If you find yourself in this situation and are worried about being from outside that world, relax. It's daunting at first but remember money doesn't make you interesting.

You'll have stories of hanging round the park, of arm wrestling your way out of bar tabs, of driving all the way to Brighton in a car with two flat tyres. Maybe, like me, you'll have a comparably strong regional accent to make you stand out in world of muted, nasal poshness.

Although, be warned - some rich kids aren't sure how to handle it. One horror I met not so long ago, kept asking me to say "Och aye the noo" which was stupid. Just because I don't have cash doesn't mean I can't make you suffer.

Also, there are fairly deep differences when it comes to background experiences. Once, when I was talking about playing outside on my bike as a child, the guy I was seeing was visibly shocked.

"You were allowed to go outside without an adult?" he asked, astonished

Yes. Why? When you went out to play, did your parents stand and watch?

"No! The nanny did."


Rich families tend to be quite interesting. One parent is usually smart and industrious and the other, a beautiful trophy. In lots of situations, the mother has invented something brilliant or done something amazing and got herself a hot 27-year-old toyboy. It's not always that crass stereotype of an old cowboy with his young Playboy wife.

Also, interesting fact to bear in mind about rich men: if they're brought up in households where his mother was comfortably the breadwinner, he'll be the best sex you'll ever have. And if you want someone rich to just jaunt about with, don't go for a guy with power couple parents. In that situation, the kids have more to live up to and have bigger plans than Instagramming their luggage.

The problem with all of this is it's short lived. After the novelty of being hedonistic with a bunch of Peter Pans wears off, I want to be with someone who's ambitious and interesting in their own right. Someone I can work at a life with, not just join in on the one that's been handed to them. I know I'll find someone I want to keep eventually but in the meantime - while it lasts - I'm keeping my passport on standby.

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