The highly-anticipated Linda Lovelace biopic starring Amanda Seyfried, Peter Sarsgaard, Sharon Stone and Adam Brody hits cinemas today. But before you even think about booking a ticket, there are a few things you should know...
... It's funny, heart-wrenching, tear-jerking, violent and you'll probably leave the darkened theatre feeling like you've been punched in the gut. It's not one to go see with your mum, or boyfriend, or any other human being for that matter.
If you can't wait for it to be released on DVD, then you should probably go and watch it solo. No, seriously. Why? Because apart from leaving you in emotional pieces on the popcorn-littered cinema floor, there's more than a few #AWKARD moments.
1. A bearded Peter Sarsgaard going down on Amanda Seyfried in her on-screen parents' kitchen
Yup, told you it wasn't one to see with mummy dearest. Said moment happens pretty early on in the flick and if you don't prepare yourself for it you'll be totally weirded out.
2. Peter Sarsgaard teaching Amanda Seyfried how to give a blow job
We promise we're not being prudish but you might wanna put your fingers in your ears and/or cover your eyes for this scene coz they really went to town on the saliva sound effect. Plus, there's silk bedsheets and a mirrored ceiling involved.
3. James Franco as Hugh Hefner
When did James Franco become THAT guy who only plays the creep? He is also wearing velour and smoking a pipe.
4. When Adam Brody rocks up with a ridiculous tash
Warning: if you are in love with Seth Cohen DO NOT go and see this film. The image of the loveable comic book enthusiast will be obliterated from your mind and replaced by mustard flares, tight polo shirt, toe-curling lip warmer AND his porn star name, Dick Long *cringes so hard, passes out*.
5. Wes Bentley
You know the guy from American Beauty with the scary eyes? Well, he's in this movie for about three minutes. Those three minutes are enough.