14/08/2014 12:32 BST | Updated 22/05/2015 06:12 BST

The 'Perfect Woman' Is Revealed (And No, She's Not A CEO)

Right, so you know how sometimes you just wish you knew what he was thinking? Well, now we do (sort of) thanks to Vanity Fair's September Issue survey, in which it asks its male readers what constitutes the perfect woman.

Before you read on, we should warn you some of the preferences are a bit prehistoric. Just don't shoot the messenger, okay? Here goes...

1. What is the most important quality in a woman?
- 39 replied brains.
- 17 good cook.
- 3 replied beauty
WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? Men still have that cave man-esque want to reproduce with someone who'll care for their offspring (survival of the fittest) and don't necessarily mind if you're not Kate Upton.

2. 63 replied smoke.
- 17 replied overeat.
- 10 replied own cats.
- 8 replied curse.
WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? Hang on, we thought smoking was cool. Just kidding! Although seriously, cursing is off-putting? Well *&?> you, buddy.

4. 55Slideshow-3411%

See the full (and very interesting) Vanity Fair survey here.