A dad has been banned from his six-year-old son's primary school for allegedly biting the headteacher after copying Luis Suarez's infamous World Cup attack.
Mark Anthony bit stunned Mary Wilson in the playground the day after disgraced Uruguay striker Suarez bit Italy's Giorgio Chiellini in the World Cup – causing the head to burst into tears and rush to hospital for a tetanus jab.
But postman Mr Anthony – who was picking up his son Neo – insisted it was a 'silly' joke and he didn't bite her.
He said: "All I did was nuzzle my mouth into her shoulder. I can't believe what was intended as a joke has been taken seriously.
"I only did it because I thought she would find it funny. I was just having a good laugh. We're both Arsenal fans and we talk about football in the playground.
"I was walking past her and all I did was nuzzle my mouth into her shoulder, make a stupid noise and run off. I did not bite her.
"I admit it was a silly and immature thing to do – especially if children were watching – but it was a joke. I wasn't threatening, I wasn't malicious."
However, the school's governors at St Mary of the Angels RC Primary in Bayswater, West London, didn't see the funny side and the following day Mr Anthony was informed he was banned from the school while it investigates the incident.
One mum who witnessed the incident told the Mirror: "I don't think he said anything, there was no row, he just thought it would be funny.
"Apparently she rang one of the parents and said she'd got really tearful about what happened that night.
"This parent was asked to attend a meeting to give a witness account. The parent was told Mrs Wilson had gone to hospital to get a tetanus jab because she was worried.
"The chair of governors said Mrs Wilson was thinking about going to the police. Of course you can't have people going around pretending to be Luis Suarez."
A spokeswoman for City of Westminster Council, which runs the school, said the incident was 'being dealt with by the school's chair of governors in line with the school's policies and procedures'.