The Pressure To Do It All

I won't lie, there is a certain feeling of monotony about my days, but no more than before M's arrival (again... what did I do with my time?!). But I guess the monotony means we've done it... we've made the transition into our new normal. I was worried about the pressure of working full time and being a devoted mummy. And it is indeed a big pressure.....
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So, it's been a while since I posted. I can tell you why... because I've been very busy, being a mummy and being a career woman. It's no easy task being both. To be honest I wonder how I ever thought I was busy before. And I wonder why on earth I got out of bed so blimmin' early every morning. Seriously. I used to take an hour to get ready, AN HOUR!! Now I take 15 minutes on a slow day!! I often think that pre-baby I could have probably spent an extra 4 hours a week in bed!

My days seem frantic, yet empty. There's little variety now, but way more to get done than there is time to do it. Baby M still hasn't perfected sleeping through the night, although there has been some improvement (either that or I'm unconscious and don't hear her!). She's an early riser though. Up at 5am most mornings and sometimes earlier. I don't really mind; it means I get an hour of mummy time before Mr MBAW is sent to get the kettle on. We have a pretty slick morning routine now and are at nursery by 7.30am.

Despite all my wobbles over nursery, I've been blessed with how quickly baby M has settled. She has taken to the girls at the nursery really well and is keen to shake me off in a morning to get to the toast (belly before all else... she is indeed her mother's daughter!). I know it's not the case for all mummies though and my heart goes out to those of you having to leave your baby crying every morning. I hope it is shortlived.

For me it's straight to work for 7.35am (very conveniently situated childcare!), and my working day starts. I have to say, I've always taken my job very seriously and worked incredibly hard, and whilst this is still exactly the same, things don't weigh as heavily on my mind anymore. I don't wake at 4am worrying about the day ahead.... mainly because I'm already up with baby M... seriously though, I just feel more efficient and equipped to deal with what the day brings my way. Pick up is followed by a slick tea time and bedtime routine before my evening starts. Which of course involves another round of emails and admin, before heading to bed as early as possible to face the long night ahead.

The late nights my job often involves have been a bit of a challenge. I'm still breastfeeding M and so have to dash home at some point to do a quick feed before heading back to work, but so far we're managing. Mainly because we have to. However progressive this country pretends to be, there really isn't a lot of flexibility for women that have 'made it' professionally, then go on to start a family. Breastfeeding just adds another layer of pressure that the 'system' isn't really designed to support, however well-meaning the government literature.

I won't lie, there is a certain feeling of monotony about my days, but no more than before M's arrival (again... what did I do with my time?!). But I guess the monotony means we've done it... we've made the transition into our new normal. I was worried about the pressure of working full time and being a devoted mummy. And it is indeed a big pressure.....

...But... I'm doing it. I'm living it. I don't know if we can 'have it all' but it would seem that we can 'do it all'. Now, where's the wine?!!

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