Whether struggling to undo bras or being unable to locate certain sweet spots, there are many secrets men still haven't uncovered when it comes to women and sex.
But before you smile knowingly, roll your eyes and blame male inadequacy, it turns out we're not doing much to help.
A survey comparing women's real sex lives to their sexual fantasies has revealed that not only are women reluctant to disclose daring details outside of the bedroom, 67% said they won’t even talk to their partner about sex.
Of the 68% of women who admitted to adventurous sexploits, almost half had used sex toys (42%), over a third had had sex in public (34%), and 30% included food in their lovemaking.
Younger women are the most daring in the bedroom, whilst women over 55 are most the conservative and least likely to be open about sex.
Sex Secrets Everyone Should Know
Start Talking About Sex(01 of08)
Open Image ModalIronically, some of the best sex secrets are those men and women keep from each other, Dr. Joannides says. To have good sex, you need to talk about your likes and dislikes."One of the most important things to do is to ask and to listen," says Joannides. "A lot of guys are terrified that some people may think they don't know all the answers. Also, some guys think they do know all the answers."It can be difficult to broach the subject of sex. But here are tips from Joannides that can clue you in to what your partner enjoys: (credit:Shutterstock)
Don't Make Things Uncomfortable (02 of08)
Open Image ModalDon't ask about what she or he doesn't like or what doesn't feel good. That puts a negative spin on it. Instead, ask her or him what feels best. (credit:Shutterstock)
Switch Roles(03 of08)
Open Image ModalFor example, let her show you what she likes rather than tell you. "A really good thing to do is to say, 'Let's switch places here. I'd like you to kiss my chest just the way you'd like me to kiss yours,'" Joannides says. "Sit back and learn.”Communication is a two-way street. Remember to let your partner know your likes and dislikes as well, including what gives you pleasure for maintaining an erection and having an orgasm. (credit:Shutterstock)
Use Study Aides (04 of08)
Open Image Modal"Try to get a book or two or three or four that you think your partner might enjoy," Joannides says. "Look through it with her and see what she's interested in. Sometimes it's easier that way because someone might not be comfortable telling you what they want to do, but they may see a photo and say, 'Hey, that looks interesting.'" (credit:Shutterstock)
Share Your Fantasies (05 of08)
Open Image ModalRemember that your brain is the most important sex organ in your body. Keep things fun and playful by talking over your fantasies with your partner. And don't feel like you should rid your mind of fantasies during sex — experts consider these fantasies an important way to kindle the desire that leads to erection and orgasm. (credit:Shutterstock)
Get Creative (06 of08)
Open Image ModalTry having sex in different places and at different times. Be playful and try out different positions. "Don't just do the same thing every night, every time," says Joannides. "It's easy to get into a rut and be really predictable. Sometimes with certain things predictability is good, and other times it isn't. It's a wise man who learns which is which." (credit:Shutterstock)
Keep Porn Online (07 of08)
Open Image Modal"Sometimes guys feel that what a woman wants is for them to be porn stars," Joannides notes. "That's probably one of the worst models for lovemaking you could ever have. It's trying to live your life like you were a character on Star Trek. It's a nice fantasy to watch. It wouldn't work if you tried to act it out in real life." (credit:Shutterstock)
Stay Fit (08 of08)
Open Image ModalExercise has been shown to improve your sex life. For example, aerobic exercise improves blood flow, which is important in achieving an erection. It also can improve your sexual stamina and strength. (credit:Shutterstock)
Nearly half of the 2,000 women questioned (45%) admitted that they fantasise about sex more than they actually have sex, and the ultimate fantasies were revealed as dominance and submission role plays, sex with a fireman or sex on a beach.
These findings suggest that despite the so-called Fifty Shades phenomenon, as well as the surge in explicit television shows such as Channel 4’s Sex Box, which films couples having sex and then discussing it afterwards, UK women still prefer to cultivate an air of mystery around their real and fantasy sex lives.
Other sex facts:
The beach is the ideal fantasy location (34%)
Dominance and submission is the favourite fantasy role play (25%)
Missionary is the favourite sexual position (35%)
Chick lit is the favourite erotic romance genre (45%)
The study was conducted by Totally Bound Publishing, who's fiction is designed to bring women high quality erotic romance with a host of captivating characters and eye-opening stories.