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What Your Smartphone Says About You, According To YouGov's Hilarious Poll Toll

This Is The Average BlackBerry Owner, According To YouGov
Michael Rundle
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Most polls about what your smartphone 'says about you' are completely boring.

But most polls of these types don't also include hilarious drawings of what people with different mobile phones actually look like.

We're still digesting the results, but here is a first-run look at the genius contained within YouGov Profile's vast database of information.

The findings, it is already clear, are hilarious.* Among them? If you own an Xperia Z1, you are a communist. If you like Huawei you are a flatcap-wearing grandpa from Scotland. And if you own an iPhone 5S, you work at Foxtons in London and everyone hates you.

*And problematic. As will be clear when going through this, the sample size for various elements of this are woefully small. The BlackBerry Z10 profile, for instance, was drawn from just 25 people -- perhaps leading to the humour contained within. Bear that in mind before trading in your Nexus.

What Your Phone Says About You
HTC One: Left-Wing Scottish Researcher(01 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 40-59 male
- Far left
- Would happily spend all day with his pet
- Wishes he didn’t have to go to work everyday
- Loves: Video Games, Boxing, Cars and MI6
- Favourite food is potato & onion stew
BlackBerry Z10: Ultra-Right Wing Yorkshire Lady(02 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 40-59 female from Yorkshire
- Far right leaning
- Enjoys travelling and holidays
- Has an interest in video games and arts & crafts
- Will most likely have a fish as a pet
- Which is unfortunate, because their favourite food is Salmon.
Sony Xperia Z1: Communist(03 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 18-24
- From the Midlands
- Communist tendencies
- Enjoys growing their own fruit and vegetables, playing video games and playing a musical instrument
- Has a cat
- Is most likely to say nothing, literally nothing
Samsung Galaxy S4: Sassy Green Party Voter(04 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 25-39 year old female
- London based
- Far-left
- Research, research and manufacturing
- Favourite interests include Video games, travelling and criminology
- LOVES Wild Boar Stew
Huawei: Elderly, Friendly Grandpa(05 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 60+
- Lives in the Borders and used to work in construction
- Loves boxing, crosswords and puzzles and local history
- More niche interests include pottery and energy efficiency
- Keeps birds
- Believes that ‘this country is going to the dogs’
Lumia 1020: Centrist Default Man(06 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 60+
- Centrist
- Works in the military and defence (probably a spy)
- Hobbies include fishing, photography and video games
- Likes going to exhibitions, watching American Football and enjoys puzzles.
- Has a cat (definitely a spy)
Nexus 5: Conservative Telecoms Nerd(07 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 40-59 Male
- Far right leaning
- From Scotland
- Probably works in telecommunications or media and publishing
- Very interested in apps and in their spare time they like playing a musical instrument
- Other niche interests include Microsoft Office and Broadband
- Has a cat (definitely not a spy)
iPhone 5S: Foxtons Employee(08 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 25-39 male
- Londoner
- Likes car clubs, runs marathons and has a general interest in -eating out.
- Will often buy products without checking the price
- Most likely owns a BMW
- Will buy clothes from T.M. Levin or Diesel
iPhone 4: Labour-Voting Architect(09 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 25-39 female
- London with slightly left-leaning tendencies
- Probably an architect
- Loves the performing arts, likes going to the cinema and can be found either swimming or sailing.
- Canada is her favourite country and she will always shop fairtrade
Nokia N8: Bearded, And Furious About Immigration(10 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 25-39 year old
- Heavily right
- Works in wholesale or transport and logistics
- Mostly enjoys fishing and DIY
- Can be found watching the golf and will most likely own a dog
Android(11 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 18-24 year old
- Male living in Northern Scotland
- Works in IT or Media and Publishing
- Likes going hillwalking or watching movies
- Has niche interests in healthcare and charity work
- Favourite meal is roast pigeon
Apple(12 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 25-39 year old
- Female living in London or Central Scotland
- Works in either Media and Publishing or Advertising
- Enjoys exercising, going out for dinner and travelling to New York
- Has a fish
- Shops and John Lewis and probably owns a BMW
Samsung Galaxy Note 3: We've Got Nothing(13 of13)
Open Image Modal

- 40-59
- Female living on the South Coast
- Left-leaning politically
- Works as an Architect or in Law
- Likes knitting and cooking
- Will often watch the rugby but still finds time to have a keen interest in women's issues and Palestine
- Shops at Lidl and owns a Skoda
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