19/01/2016 05:14 GMT | Updated 14/01/2017 05:12 GMT

The Diet Of Doom

Today I'm starting a Diet Of Doom... Actually I'm being over dramatic it's not that doomous.

The reason for this self inflicted period of doomousness is that I have to have some pretty major hip surgery in April and as I will be inactive and having to rehab my hip I want to give my body the best chance of recovery and dropping eight kilos will really help.

I know it seems paradoxical, an alternative health expert having surgery but I'm a BIG believer that medical intervention can be used as a preventative measure AND as a last resort and in my case the surgery is both.

Turns out that the niggling lower back pain I've had for decades is in fact a complicated birth defect in my hips. Apparently my ball joint is rugby ball shaped and my socket is too deep. This issue brilliantly meant I could do the splits three ways which was useful when I was 17 and doing gymnastics contests but at (nearly) 40 the rotation is starting to cause some serious damage.

I am sooo deeply commited to finding a natural solution, believe me when I say I have tried every supplement, every treatment, every expert and every emotional avenue possible - everything helps but nothing makes it go away and now I am struggling to bend (gets me out of loading the dishwasher) or wear heels, which is a personal disaster as my shoe collection is a bit like Carrie Bradshaws..

Back to the diet of doom..

I've always struggled with my weight, it's been my personal Achilles heel and one of the main drivers for choosing to live a healthy lifestyle. Paleo is great for me as a maintenance but because I have adrenal insufficiency (I have Sheehan's syndrome, another rare condition, trust me when I tell you I'm now fed up of being medically unusual) my body struggles to lose weight. I was working with an amazing dietitian who sourced this plan for me from an endocrinologist who works with adrenal insufficiency and I trialled it in September and dropped a whopping 10 kilo's so I know it works and my body responds to it but I'm just psyching myself up to go back into it after two months of holiday loveliness!

It goes against everything I believe in as a nutritionist. It's low carb, low fat, moderate protein with intermittent fasting, minimal fun and maximum misery but it works for my weird body and to be clear this is short term (4 rounds of 3 weeks on the plan with reset days) I am a highly experienced nutritionist and I'm supervised well... This is no crash diet!!

I'm sharing because a) I want to keep myself motivated and being public about it will help me do that b) as someone living authentically I want to be really honest about my fears/feelings and my emotional process because I know I'm not the only person who thinks this stuff and by naming my fears my ego is forced to look at them as the false projections they are

My fears today are:

1) it won't work like it did before

2) I won't stick at it so well

3) I'm going to miss olive oil

4) I'm going to miss raw chocolate

That's where I am and i'm here with my arch nemesis "The Scales".... Here I go, wish me luck