'Fanny Condensation' Mumsnet Thread May Be The Most Hilarious Forum To Date

Plastic chairs are the enemy.
Henrik Sorensen via Getty Images

Mums have once again taken to Mumsnet for a no-holds-barred discussion on bodily functions.

The topic that’s got us all giggling this time? “Fanny condensation.”

User ‘ClopySow’ took to the forum to share her embarrassing experience of leaving a damp patch behind after sitting on a plastic chair.

“Please tell me it’s not just me,” she said.

“It happened tonight at school parents meeting. Stood up after a nice chat with the maths teacher and there is it, the diamond shaped condensation patch of doom.

“I nearly name changed because I am very embarrassed, but fuck it.”

In true Mumsnet style, it wasn’t long before hundreds of other women said they too had been haunted by the dreaded patch.

Some referred to the phenomenon as “minge mist”, while others called it “steamy fanjo”.


Thankfully, one user was on hand to offer advice on dealing with the “diamond of doom”.

“Slide forwards or turn sideways when getting up and you wipe it away with your butt,” she said.

Meanwhile, another user was adamant we should embrace our vaginas and any possible by-product of them.

“Next time it happens, draw a smiley face in it like it was a bus window, do a lick-finger-touch-ass-sizzle and strut off like RuPaul,” she urged others.

This may have taken over #PenisBeaker as the most Mumsnet thread to ever grace Mumsnet.

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