THE BLOG
23/02/2018 16:51 GMT | Updated 23/02/2018 16:52 GMT

Not All Female Work Colleagues Will Be Friends. Get Over It

We need to get over it and stop assuming it is because all women like to be 'bitches'

When I worked in a bank back in my early 20s it was my first ‘proper’ job. Before then I had been at college (mainly bumming about) and then worked in retail for a bit before deciding I wanted to earn more money and meet new people.

Lucky for me I met some amazing new people, two of which are still very close friends to this day and I’m pretty sure will be for as long as I live. They are funny, clever, loyal, truthful, opinionated, interesting and they are two of the best friends I have ever had.

We had quite a large social crowd back then however it was a big place to work with many different personalities, some of which I didn’t ever particularly warm to and some who I am sure didn’t warm to me.

(Think high school but amplified.)

I remember a few of us girls used to go out drinking or generally socialising - including the two girls I am still close with today - and there was another girl I got on brilliantly with. By accident I ended up living in the same block of apartments as her so we would get together for cups of tea, dinner, go for walks and hang out.

In my head I saw us as a group of four girlfriends but it was only when this other girl became my neighbour I learned that she and one of the other girls didn’t get on. In fact they couldn’t stand eachother. I was devastated. Looking back I can see now that it was probably because they were actually very similar; both very strong, opinionated females with a sharp tongue. Of course they were going to clash.

The friend neighbour eventually moved out of the apartments and while we stayed in touch for a while eventually it teetered off. Our quartet became a trio although in reality we only ever really were a three, I just hadn’t seen it.

The whole point of my story is; no matter what you do some people just don’t get on. In a workplace - especially a large workplace where there are a lot of people just thrown together - there will be clashes of personality and conflicting interests. There will be some colleagues that you can tolerate enough to get by and some who will make you grind your teeth.

This seems to be more of an issue if it is women who don’t get on.

Reading yet another article about the apparant spat between Sex and The City’s Sarah Jessica Parker and Kim Cattrall since Kim so publicly stated her feeling towards SJP when she commented on one of her Instagram posts got me thinking back to those bank days and our so called friendship foursome.

There were also two girls I worked with back then who didn’t like each other and it was made such a big thing of. People were always trying to stir things up between them and it was always assumed they were jealous of eachother when in reality they just didn’t get on. No jealousy. No secret back story. Just two different personalities. It happens, we need to get over it and stop assuming it is because all women like to be bitches.

I think with celebs such as SJP and Kim we like to assume they’re all BFFs because otherwise it ruins the show a little bit for us. To watch the characters we love go about their lives together, be there for eachother and know that in reality they didn’t all get on is quite sad. But it happens. Actors are just as much work colleagues as bank clerks.

Yes it is quite juicy to watch unfold online but that should be where the morbid fascination ends.