01/04/2015 08:03 BST | Updated 30/05/2015 06:59 BST

Being 'Selfish' - The Most Selfless Act You Can Do For Yourself

Saying 'no' can be one of the hardest things, especially when we are doing our best to impress. The commitments pile up and all of a sudden you are drowning in a sea of tasks that seem never-ending.  There is no guilt to be found in admitting that you're feeling run down, you love your role at your job, as a parent or caregiver, but sometimes it can be overwhelming.  I'm sure a lot of us can relate to this scenario. I have said 'yes' to too much in the past, only to be left with a to-do list as long as my arm and felt completely consumed by it all. Taking a step back, being selfish and focusing on ourselves now and then can be one of the most selfless acts that you can do for yourself. 

When I'm talking about being selfish for your own benefit, I don't mean that you become a complete b**tch and give everyone two fingers (although sometimes this may be warranted!). God forbid, that's not my point at all.  Some time to myself, no matter how short allows me to indulge my passions, spend time with the people who I love, reorganise and regroup my thoughts and generally just relax.  Time to yourself in today's world is such a blessing and putting yourself first can work wonders for your stress levels and mental health.  If you can, schedule a day off or half-a-day where you simply focus on you. You become your main priority and you spend some time doing the things that you love. 

Taking time out for yourself doesn't have to make a hole in your purse either. Not convinced? Well, sitting down reading a book with a cup of tea can be just as effective as going to a spa. Other budget-friendly ways of taking time out could be going for a run, yoga, baking, a walk in the park, making a coffee, watching a movie, a home pamper session or a night in with the girls or loved ones - anything that gives you that feeling of escape. 

Looking after ourselves goes much deeper than working out 5 times a week, eating the right foods or giving yourself a pedicure, it also involves a huge amount of 'self-love' as well. To love yourself and have a positive outlook on your life, appearance and aspirations are by no means an easy feat. Of course, life isn't about unicorns and rainbows and events will happen that will make us feel like total crap about ourselves, this is perfectly fine. The problem stems from how often we feel this way and how we deal with these challenges about how we perceive ourselves.

As a new mother my little one keeps me on my toes with round the clock care and feeds, let's not beat around the bush, motherhood is a huge challenge.  Making time for yourself and expressing self-love as a mother, daughter, sister or auntie is so very important and something that we all need to practise as time allows. Just a snippet in the day or week to yourself can make all the difference to your all round happiness and your body and mind will only thank you for it later.

Loving yourself and being selfless towards yourself is essential to enjoying life to its fullest in all aspects. This isn't always going to be the case and although I'm a very positive person I know that there are times when this approach just isn't going to work. Practicing self-love, selflessness and having self-respect for yourself can influence many of the life decisions that we make.

Appreciating our own self-worth, which can be developed through many acts of self-kindness can allow us to grow as people and enhance our health and well-being.

Do you prioritise yourself now and then? Do you feel guilty for doing this?

How do you practise being selfless to yourself?

Jemma Andrew-Adiamah is a health and wellness writer, recipe developer and blogger at Celery and Cupcakes. You can follow her on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and

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