03/08/2017 12:23 BST | Updated 03/08/2017 12:23 BST

The Rise Of The Insta-Mum


Image by Dear Little Daisy

Life isn't a beautifully presented Instagram breakfast. It's a carpet soaked in milky cheerios. Life isn't a morning stroll with the kids to the park. It's grabbing a few minutes to hide from them and drinking coffee whilst it's still warm. I was tired before I had a child - but then I had a child and was met with the many layers that merge together to create 'exhaustion'. Life seemed straight forward before having my daughter - nowadays it feels messy. I naively believed that when you have children you turn into this self proclaimed 'real' grown up. You hold it all together - the husband, the kids, the dog, the house.  I had this warped idea that life was meant to follow a certain path. That there's a right and wrong way to do it. Yet the only wrong assumption was that thought process - the right and the wrong way.

Everyone does it differently and most people have their own secret ingredient - something that makes their life theirs. I'm not sure where this social ideology developed from - but I hate it. I used to find myself comparing my life to everyone's around me. They have a house - I only have a flat. But I'm 26 and have a child? Surely I should have a mortgage? They're married? Should I not be getting married soon? But then I stopped.

I half blame my mind set and half blame social media. It's so easy to peer into someone else's life. It's so easy to see what they're doing and compare their path to your own. The pretty white interiors. The breakfast in bed. The huge bunch of flowers from the local florist. The picture perfect home. The picture perfect clothes. The picture perfect life with the picture perfect caption. The conventional and pretty way of living your life online. Well, I'm going to be a little unconventional here and say that it's all pretty much bollocks. In a way, influencers are salesmen. They are selling a lifestyle through creating a picturesque version of their life. There's no harm in this - I do it too. I put my hands up and say that I'm a little guilty of sugar coating my life. I love pretty pictures and reading pretty words. But it's when the comparison game kicks in - that's when you've got to hit the nail on the head.

You can paint a life that looks nice on the outside, but it's nothing if it's not authentic on the inside. The reality is that your nice white walls have once been covered in paint, felt tips, ketchup. The reality is that your kid has thrown a major tantrum in the middle of a busy supermarket. The reality is that you've been covered head to toe in sick, poo, piss. The reality in actual fact, is much better than the painted pretty picture. The reality is life as it is. Pure, authentic and real. 

So with the rise of the insta-mum and digital lifestyles - let's keep it real. Don't filter out the rubbish because sometimes it's the rubbish we want to see. In a world with so many people conveying their life online, surely being authentic is more important than painting your life as a pretty picture?

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