Going through loss or bereavement teaches you a thing or two about attachment. Love, connection, compassion and empathy are human conditions. They're innate, genetic and what makes us truly unique amongst the animal kingdom.
I found my first business coach, who helped me on the path towards setting up my own business, and who finally gave me permission to say, "You know what, yes, this job is great on paper, but I want MORE, and I want it differently, and I don't give a fuck who knows it".
Sex after a stroke can be extremely scary. You worry, in case a orgasm increases your blood pressure. You worry that with
I slowly taught myself to relish every moment. Squeeze every bit of joy I could out of the process. Because it was the only time I didn't feel totally horrendous inside. I found that I could stretch the work feeling far beyond the hours I was filming a show.
Excuse me? Love yourself? Are you crazy? Oh no, no, no, we're far too used to telling ourselves we're too tall, too small, too messy, too lazy, too tired, too fat, too grumpy, too rubbish at parenting, too busy making mistakes.
What I have to regularly remind myself is that people will judge you whether you worry about their opinions or not, so you may as well do what you want to do. Plus, when you think about it, worrying about the opinion of others is actually incredibly self-indulgent because it's based on the assumption that you are important enough to others that they even care about what you're up to.
"Holy fuck!", I thought as I walked through airport security, away from a waving Charlotte as I fought back tears. It seemed ironic that in walking into airport security, I was leaving behind my own. "What the fu*king fu*k am I doing?"
One of the most frustrating things about chronic illness is the unpredictability of it -- I never know how I'm going to feel. Sometimes I can do stuff, sometimes I can't, and it's so bloody confusing. Even after almost 10 years of health stuff, I still haven't figured it out, and I don't think I ever will.
You have taught us five crucial lessons.
'My haters motivate me.'