Being an Irish actor in London I have had my fair share of not getting jobs and over the years I've learnt to deal with it and move on. I've been lucky and had several great jobs since leaving drama school but no matter how much I work there is always room for more and when I'm unemployed for more than a week I get itchy feet and wonder if it is all my fault.
I know this is common occurrence among all actors. I recently read an article on Tom Conti and even he still has anxieties about where and when the next job is coming. A scary thought for anyone out there with less that his 30 plus years experience!
After each missing opportunity, I have to keep telling myself that it's not because I'm a bad actor, or if it is, I have to tell myself that anyway! There are numerous reason why acting jobs "go the other way" (where is this "other way" and why am I not "going there" all the time to hang out?) It can be because you are a little too tall, a little too short, and a little too beautiful or in my case once "he doesn't look Irish enough".
Once you get to a point where everyone you met likes you and want to works with you, there is still a long way to go. Having the director, casting director and maybe even writer on your side doesn't mean, "The kid stays in the picture". There are numerous producers, commissioners and people with funny titles that have to like the look of you, which is another world altogether than I don't understand and I don't think I want to. I like to think of it a magical world with loads of floating heads pulling on strings with their teeth, like magical puppet masters.
My most recent experience however left me feeling even more helpless to the outcome of my career.
A few months ago, I auditioned for a part in a low budget movie being filmed in Belfast where I lived for the first 18years of my life (for those map readers out there, I actually lived in a place called Carrickfergus. Yes, like the song.) After the audition, I proceeded on my usual task of forgetting about it. This has takes years to perfect, so that I don't spend the next few weeks checking my phone working. Leaving me free to do other work.
A few months passed and my agent called me up to tell me that the director and casting director loved me and they would like to offer me a part. This left me feeling confused and then jubilant because I had succeeded forgetting about the job altogether. Result! I had successfully cleared all the relevant hurdles that I needed to get over.
Once we had realised that they were paying hardly any money and filming dates were worked out, I promptly accepted. I always love going home to work, because it feels good for numerous reasons. Going home to see family and friends is paramount but going home to see family and friends face's when they realise I have made a career out of acting, is a close second.
While trying to sort my accommodation in Ireland (my Mum's house) over the next week, I get a phone call from my agent saying there are a few details they are trying to iron out about the "travel days" (which are the "days" within which you "travel" to the filming location. In this case flying from London to Belfast) but there was nothing to worry about. How wrong he was.
After having the job for a week, it was taken away from me and given to someone who lived locally. This was claimed to be because the brokers involved in the film were unable to insure an actor to fly over for the part. There could have been many other reasons why this had happened. They may not have wanted to spend the £200 to fly me over. But they had already asked me which airport I was flying from and I had already organised to stay in alternative accommodation (my Mum's house) due to the low budget. Or they could have just changed their mind about me.
No matter what the reasoning was, I was left perplexed as to how this could happen AFTER I'd been offered the job? So to add to my long list of people/hurdles to get over to get an acting job, I'm now going to put "Insurance Broker" firmly at the top.