It may be supercharging the libidos of women around the world, but Fifty Shades Of Grey is heaping pressure on men as they struggle to keep up with the kinky demands from their Christian Grey-loving partners, a study has found.
A survey by ECigaretteDirect.co.uk found more than half of the 500 men they quizzed (55%) admitted they felt more under pressure than ever to step it up in the bedroom after their partner read the erotic novel.
Although 34% said they encouraged their other half to read the bondage book, a large proportion admitted they later regretted it after their partners began to knacker them out with their sexual requests.
“I’d heard a little about the books and thought it would be a good idea for my wife to give them a read - I didn’t know what I was letting myself in for,” one participant said, according to the study.
“I don’t know whether I’m going to be able to meet her demands and keep her satisfied.”
And it looks like the bondage demands aren’t going to ease anytime soon, as a recent study by Durex found that Brits are indulging in risqué lovemaking more often than you think.
The ‘Big British Sex Survey’ discovered that nearly one in four Brits participate in bondage.
A further 38% admitted to using handcuff during sex and 41% enjoy being spanked. Nearly one in 10 (8%) use a butt plug during sex – another taboo broken in the BSDM (Bondage and Discipline, Sadism and Masochism) world of Fifty Shades.
“Most men like to believe themselves to be sexually driven alpha males but when it’s the female dictating the lovemaking it seems for many this can come with significant added pressures,” a spokesperson from ECigaretteDirect told HuffPost Lifestyle.
“The poll offers some really interesting insight into the male psyche and I think dispels the myth that they are all sex mad.
"Instead what we have found is that they can often be all mouth and no trousers, preferring to boast about their sexual exploits rather than live up to them when given the opportunity.”
If you're thinking of dabbling in bondage Fifty Shades style, take a look at these tips for beginners...
Bondage For Beginners
"Bondage" covers a very wide spectrum of sex acts, and can mean something different to every person," says Rochelle Peachey, couples counsellor, author and founder of transatlantic dating site <a href="www.iloveyouraccent.com" target="_hplink"> I Love Your Accent</a> Is it being blindfolded and maybe tying your wrists with silk scarves or something way more elaborate? Or something you would like to add to your sex life or is this something you like to do all the time? Whatever it is, as long as you both agree on the boundaries, anything goes. Bondage isn't all whips, dungeons and medieval torture but make no mistake they do play a huge part for many."
Make Your Own Rules
"There are no rules to follow, you make the rues together," says <strong>Rochelle Peachey</strong>. "Create a special word in case it gets too much for you, something sexier than screaming "get off me".
"Although it's often more tempting to play sex games when you're feeling a bit tipsy, it's best not to try bondage when you're under the influence of drink or drugs, as you might misjudge how tightly to tie the knots or, as the restrained person, be unable to establish your comfort levels in an accurate way," says <strong>Emily Dubberley</strong>, author of <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Field-Guide-cking-Hands/dp/1592335098" target="_hplink"><em>The Field Guide to F*cking</em></a>.
"Take a DIY approach to bondage if you're on a budget. Clingfilm can be used to wrap around your lover's wrists, and if you use a single layer, it's easy enough to snap. You can get kitsch and use liquorice bootlaces to bind your lover's wrists, go for a cheap option and use toilet paper," advises <strong>Emily Dubberley</strong>.
"With bondage, there's a risk you can tie your partner too tightly and cause damage to their nerves. To avoid this, when someone is restrained by their wrists or ankles make sure that you check their extremities (hands and feet) regularly to ensure that they're not going cold (which is a sign that you've blocked their circulation). If the extremities do feel cold, untie your partner immediately and massage their hands or feet to help restore blood flow," explains <strong>Rochelle Peachey</strong>.
"Make sure that you keep a pair of scissors to hand, so that you can release your partner quickly if the need arises. Similarly, if you're using handcuffs, keep two sets of handcuff keys near by (it's always best to have a spare just in case you lose the first set)," says <strong>Emily Dubberley</strong>.