Confession time: we have more than once been known to purchase a bottle of wine purely because we like the picture on the label. (A cute kangaroo gets us every time.)
We only mention this not-so-astonishing fact because the flipside to this is surely that certain other label images could definitely put people off buying. You know? Like a picture of Adolf Hitler, for instance.
Nevertheless, a supermarket in Garda, northern Italy, has come under attack for selling bottles of plonk sporting labels depicting the Nazi dictator in various poses.
Prosecutors have now opened an investigation after two understandably startled US tourists complained to the police, reports the Corriere della Sera.
"The only crime that could be currently attributable to this is that of apologising for fascism," prosecutor Mario Giulio Schinaia told news agency ANSA. "At this point, though, it would be opportune to invent the crime of human stupidity." Well said, mate! (Er... it is OK to call Italian legal eagles "mate", isn't it?)
But hang on! We're starting to recognise a trend here. Remember the Austrian man who was cleared to continue selling Hitler-adorned schnapps? Or the recent story about a woman who got thrown out of a London bar for complaining about Adolf wine labels?
We can't let this happen, folks. Something must be done. Hitler can't invade our alcohol bottles. Bring back the kangaroos, koalas, rolling hills and common-or-garden grapes immediately!
Pole Dance Doll
The keywords on the box read "Interesting," "Flash," and "Up and Down," which sound like they were written by the happiest pedophile in playland.
Shave The Baby
So many questions... 1) Why does this baby have so much pubic hair? 2) Why does this baby have hair suspenders? 3) Why does this baby have hairy ankles? Bottom line: Most babies don't need shaving and encouraging that is creepy.
Kid’s Nipple Tassle T-Shirt
Available in “nipper sizes” 0-6 months, 6-12 months. Shudder.
Spanish toymaker Berjuan released a doll that allows children to "breast-feed" their babies. A girl wears a special halter top with flowers instead of nipples that cause the baby to make sucking sounds and move its mouth. The tagline for the toy reads, "Because you shouldn't have to wait until you have breasts before you start breastfeeding your baby." We think you should.
"My child has herpes!" If that's something you'd like to yell without your child actually being infected with a venereal disease then these plushies are for you...you weirdo.
Finally! Baby stilettos have hit the market to give those unsightly flab-filled baby calves some lift. They will be useful for the girls who loved the pole-dancing doll and moved on to <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-412195/Tesco-condemned-selling-pole-dancing-toy.html">this.</a>
Toy Tattoo Gun
The GR8 TaT2 Maker by Spin Master Toys promises an "easy-to-use tattoo maker kit...[that] creates realistic, washable designs with dramatic effects." Where's the hepatitis plushy when you need it?