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It's Time for the Lady and the Trump

09/06/2016 16:42 | Updated 09 June 2016

In the reality show that is the US Election it's the end of the beginning but the way things are going it feels like the beginning of the end - for all of us.

For Hillary Clinton fans like myself the time has arrived. She's crossed over the number of delegates to be able to say securely that she is the presumptive nominee for the Democratic party. It's nearly as secure as the emails she kept on her own private server while she was Secretary of State.

It's not been an easy ride for those of us that have been 'with her', it' been more like being stuck watching reruns of nature documentaries. Supporters of the Donald Trump at least got to watch him kill off seventeen rivals. It's been bloodier than House of Cards. Sometimes Trump even knocked them off with his own tiny little hands.

And if you're a fan of politics as blood sport, settle in, pop your popcorn, crack open a cool beverage and get ready to watch the upcoming season of 'The Lady and The Trump'. Much like the beloved film, America has gone to the dogs, but instead of a scrappy tramp, this time Lady is hanging out with a rabid billionaire.

As we come to the end of Series One, it's time to accept a few things about the upcoming season. Firstly, series regular Donald really does seem to be on track to be nominated by the Republican party - in spite of saying whatever comes into his mind, in spite of breaking every rule ever written about running for President, and in spite of just being himself.

Secondly, on the Democratic side, it is also time for acceptance - especially for the diehard Bernie Sanders fans. For them, his losing will cause more outrage than the death of your favourite character in Game of Thrones.

His fans have 'Felt the Bern' all year, it's been quite the party. Now they are waking up with the mother of all 'Hillary Hangovers'. They get to realise that big speeches, given in big venues, with big enthusiasm don't count as much as winning the most votes. It's one of the plot twists that everyone saw coming, except them.

And America will have to accept Hillary Clinton will be nominated by the Democratic party - in spite of the her many scandals, in spite of her husband's troublesome philanderings, and in spite of just being herself.

Because even as a supporter it's been hard to get fired up by Hillary, she's secretive and kinda weird. And I'm saying that as someone who voted for her. At times, liking her is like saying you you think that Orange is the New Black would be better if it was just grey.

For the other lead characters the show on both sides, has been consumed with passion - with two competing storylines - the disenfranchised white working class supporters of Donald Trump vs the disenfranchised white middle class supporters of Bernie Sanders. Both groups spent a lot of times demonstrating a lack of class.

The actual groups of disenfranchised people in America have been left out of the show lately. But they didn't get too disenfranchised about it, it's kind of what they're used to. Plus, they know they will be right back in the story line, once that story is about crime or terrorism.

And you can really feel the bafflement of people who aren't used to being disenfranchised - it is quite upsetting. I mean really, when are the underrepresented white people of America ever gonna get their opportunity to have the American plotline be about them?

Coming up in Season Two of this election, there is loads more fun to come. With more passion and more sparks. Actual sparks, and probably actual fires, there will be plenty outside both party conventions in July.

For the Democrats, it remains to be seen whether Bernie Sander's fanclub will let their burning desire for self-righteousness turn outwards to people who actually disagree with them on the issues, or will they decide it's more important to burn down their own party to validate that self-righteousness.

They might have a point that the system is corrupt, but if they don't decide to go along with the winner of their primary (that's Hillary, the woman leading Bernie by over three million votes), they might make it easier to hand the election to someone who isn't a result of the corrupt system - he's a system corrupter.

That's one of the areas where Trump's popularity comes from - people know he will speak the truth about a system that is broken. Trump has talked a lot about the fact that politicians are controlled by the people who give them money. He knows first hand as he is usually the one doing the corrupting. Trump's campaign slogan should be, "I'm here to cut out the middle man".

And will Hillary's popularity go up? Is this finally her time to be liked? She got voted off during her last appearance on Change We Can Believe In. Now she's a grandma. How can the rest of America not love a grandma? I think she's the one who can finally give America what it needs: A Nana state.

Spoiler Alert: Don't worry about Bernie, he's already got a job lined up as one of the grumpy old men on the Muppet Show.

Erich McElroy is a British based American comedian. He is previewing his latest Edinburgh Festival Fringe show - Erich McElroy's (US) Electile Dysfunction. Come and laugh at him. www.erichmcelroy.com

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