Those changes will empower you. Those words will put you back in control of your life. There isn't a nameless "something" out there trying to keep you from being able to do something; it's right there inside yourself in that horrible little "C" word. Only you can make it disappear and put yourself back in the driver's seat.
Everyone sits down and says the relationship is in trouble and then tells me the many ways in which the other person is lacking. The conversations are always about what's missing between them or how thing have changed, and a litany of the other person's shortcomings, long before they might mention their own contributions.
I was chatting with a friend recently and mentioned that since I moved back to Calgary, I've started a monthly "Family Night." He said that sounded like a great idea and mentioned that his family only gets together at funerals now, and that they keep saying they should meet up in between but "it never happens. Maybe soon."
Indeed, love probably means as many different things as there are people - from the unselfish care of a Mother Teresa to the heart-pounding passion of star-crossed lovers Romeo and Juliet. Yet with Valentine's Day upon us it's the romantic variety tugging at our heartstrings, especially if we lack that special someone to share it with.
What might be the basis for not accepting second class health? Perhaps because its as innate to our spiritual sense to feel health is natural as it is politically to demand equal rights. "In health there is freedom. Health is the first of all liberties," mused Swiss poet and philosopher Henri Frédéric Amiele.
The virtues of forgiveness in many different contexts of life are manifold and well known. Forgiveness can encourage and enable healing, peaceful relations, improved individual and social welfare, and psychological well being. But forgiveness is a personal choice and it must not be coerced, whether implicitly or explicitly. It is not a panacea.