If my mum had this surgery all those years ago I would still have her here to guide me. Instead, I have a memory box full of random items such as an old pill box and her hospital bands. To most people these might seem like junk, but to me it's all I have left of her. Now and then I go and sit on the floor and empty the box and read some of the notes in there and her old diary.
Many have told me that my petition is restricting freedom of speech. This is not about banning protests, just moving them to a safe distance away from women accessing the clinics. If these protests are about educating women about abortion (which I find to be an incredibly patronising reason) and not to intimidate, then I cannot see why a legal buffer zone would be an issue for them...
Once again my mind had become full of numbers and targets and filled with this concept that every minor set back was an enormous failure. Suddenly the all too familiar ritual of daily weigh-ins and calorie counting became habitual and without thinking I was slipping back into the icy grasp of anorexia, who I had tried so hard to separate from.
There is some evidence to show that if women are on the Pill for more than ten years, they may be at a slightly higher risk from breast and cervical cancers, but it is possible that this is because these cancers tend to be picked up earlier as women on the Pill tend to have health check-ups more often.
The worst conversation many of us will ever have will relate to deadly diseases such as gynaecological cancers. And one thing is very clear to me - these diseases don't discriminate; they can affect women at any age. Nearly 20,000 women in the UK are diagnosed with a gynaecological cancer and almost 8,000 die within five years.
My bitterness towards you comes and goes. I know it's going to take me time to trust you again. But equally I've watched with amazement at how you've taken on this new challenge with aplomb. You've been prodded and poked and stabbed and jabbed. You've healed and strengthened and moved on and adapted.
It only really dawned on me that I had become caught up in a Zeitgeist when a woman I had recently interviewed about her cycle - by connecting with her naively on Facebook - popped up in The Guardian. Our formerly taboo, at best innocuous, monthly cycles are front page news - and I've been watching the whole thing unfold.
Birth doesn't always allow for a 'heads up' on what is likely to happen. Are we giving some women the idea that they will be in control of something that really is an unknown, just by calling it a 'Birth Plan'? We can only really be in control of how we respond to some events, not the events themselves.