THE BLOG

I Don't Need a Man, I've Got a Cat

18/11/2015 17:51 GMT | Updated 18/11/2016 10:12 GMT

According to the Daily Mail, a lady called Barbarella loved her cats so much that she married them. She said that her two pets made her happier than any human husband could and I agree with her. I haven't married my cat, nor do I plan to but I would choose a cat over a man any day. I know this makes me a cat lady but I am certainly not a crazy cat lady as some have unfairly labelled me.

We've all heard the stereotype of the crazy cat woman. She's single, probably of a certain age, surrounded by cats, smelling of cat food, wearing a jumper she hand-knitted from the discarded hair of her many pets and sporting hair dressed with cat litter. Basically some would have you believe she has embraced the idea of spinsterhood with gusto and a loyalty card at Pets R Us.

After all, what glamorous woman would choose a cat over finding Mr. Right?

Well, this one would. I am in my forties - although I haven't been here long - I'm divorced and I have a lovely six-year-old son. I also have a six-year-old cat. And that is my family. Loving cats is perfectly normal. Actually I would go so far as to argue that being a cat lady is actually pretty damn cool and I think more women should try it.

I don't think I smell of cat food, I certainly don't knit with my cat's hair and I feel I need to take a stand as I don't think that us women should be branded as crazy cat ladies, just because we love cats more than men. I also like to consider myself mildly glamorous. I get my nails done every three weeks, I have my hair coloured professionally and I rarely leave the house without make-up. I love fashion and spend far too much money on handbags and shoes.

Maybe the reason I am a cat lady is that I always seem to choose the wrong man, although I seem to be rather good at choosing cats. Perhaps I can read cats more than I can read men, or maybe it is because they are uncomplicated. I seem drawn to men who are bad for me yet I have never met a cat who was anything but good for me.

And then there is the scientific proof on the bond between women and cats, so it's perfectly normal for me to prefer them to men. According to research, scientists at the University of Vienna, analysed the interactions between forty-one cats and their owners, and found that the relationships between the females and their feline friends were stronger than cats with male owners.

Cats sometimes get bad press, being called selfish, disloyal and lazy but, in my view, that description more accurately sums up the men I have been involved with. My cat is far from selfish, she seems to know when I need a little bit of affection, she keeps me company, she's pretty energetic and entertaining and she is very, very clean. If only my boyfriends/husband had been more like cats I often hear myself saying. To my cat.

I love my cat and I wouldn't be without her. Yet I have learnt to live quite happily without a man. I think that's because cats are:

  • Affectionate but independent
  • Entertaining and fun
  • Uncomplicated in their needs
  • Clean
  • Gifted with a huge capacity for love Is it any wonder that I believe it's perfectly acceptable to choose a cat over a man? My cat is the perfect companion when my son is in bed, she doesn't hog the remote control or moan when I want to watch The Bachelor, in fact I think she quite likes it

I used to write modern romantic fiction, but after my divorce I went from chick lit to cat lit and I haven't looked back. Writing about a main character that is a cat might seem unusual to some, but honestly Alfie the cat is the best hero I believe I have ever written. The bottom line is that I still write about love because love does make the world go round but it is a different sort of love. For me, the love of my son and my cat is all I want right now. Along with a pair of heels, a gorgeous handbag and the odd glass of Champagne of course.

After all, what more does this woman need?