This is the talent show that promises to scour the breadth of Britain for the country's best, undiscovered entertainers. Last week, this brought us a dancing dog and a man whose mantra “Where’s My Keys? Where’s My Phone?” immediately created a new catchphrase. How could this week possibly match up?
Well, this was the night that Britain’s Got Talent officially jumped the shark, as one of the judges couldn’t resist but join the contestants on stage.
WATCH Walliams on fire with the Showbears...
Any pretence that this show was a rival to The Voice over on the other channel went out the window as Walliams – who else? – couldn’t stay in his seat once the Showbears, resplendent in glittering silver sailor suits, started their dancing routine to It’s Raining Men. Before we knew it, Walliams was joining in, sequinned cap and all. Suddenly it was 1982 all over again, with Walliams taking part in The Generation Game. Simon was left to mark the scores on the doors, and it was a big Yes.
Apart from this lot, physicality was the theme of the night, with dance troupe United We Stand impressing Simon - he said they were in the template of Diversity, a group who even beat Susan Boyle into second place as champions three years ago.
Hungarian basketball team were another athletic bunch, bouncing around between hoops, and getting through to the next round. Walliams asked them, “Is Simon famous in Hungary?” “He’s famous everywhere," they told him.
Also appearing on stage were Strictly Wheels, made up of Mancunian duo - Paula in a wheelchair, Gary not - whose act saw them dance together. Alesha told them they were "beautiful to watch, inspiring, refreshing, unique".
There were two of the usual balladeers, Hope from Essex, a 16-year-old who Simon asked, “What is the reaction you get when you sing in public?” "Mostly positive," she replied before making a nervous start. Once Simon asked her to sing another song, she belted out Woman’s Work by “Maxwell” (Kate Bush, surely?) and visibly impressed the judges.
Paige looked even younger, and also got through, while her dad wiped away a tear.
Rejectees this week included a mother and daughter team, whose rendition of You Don’t Have To Say You Love Me was almost in tune, and Scottish Neil, a joiner by day, transvestite strutter by night. He had barely started doing his stuff before Simon’s buzzer seemed to work all by itself.
Other acts included the Pipe Bandits - self-explanatory, see pictures below - and two chaps on roller skates channelling Torvill and Dean along to Aerosmith's Don't Wanna Miss A Thing, which raised only this from Simon - "I can genuinely say I’ve never seen anything like that before."
And after reports of Amanda Holden's upset that she wasn't getting enough on-screen love, she was in a lot of shots tonight. So that's that, sorted.
Some of this week's contestants...