There are three definitive signs that "the end" is nigh.
They are: a giant Stay Puft Marshmallow man trampling through the streets, John McCririck becoming a feminist and when rivers run red with the blood of everyone who still watches Celebrity Big Brother.
Well, you can tick at least one of those things off right now, for this was the scene in a small Slovakian town this week.
Residents in Myjava awoke from their slumbers to find a river running through their town flowing red - with what is assumed to be real blood.
Roman Podbrezova, 65, told Central European News: "I just could not believe my eyes. The river was dark red. It was like something from a horror film. Blood cascading through the centre of town."
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Another local said: "This is really creepy. Yesterday evening I walked past here and it was it's normal beautiful bluey-green.
"Now it looks like someone slaughtered 1,000 virgins or something. I'm not superstitious, and we've never had any serial killers or anything like that here, but this isn't normal.
"How could a river fill with blood without some seriously evil event behind it? I immediately called the police."
Police spokesman Elena Antalova said: "We are checking the source of the blood and what caused it.
"At the moment we are thinking it could have come from dead fish or maybe someone washed a barrel containing blood in the river.
"It seems it came from the drains directly above the museum," she said.
Another possible answer to the mystery may be a slaughterhouse several miles upstream on the River Myjava.
Usually its water is pumped into a retaining pool where it is filtered before being released into the river, but in this case police suspect the filtration system may have gone awry, it was reported.