BREAKING NEWS: University Listens To Its Students

In an unprecedented move, a university has given its students what they asked for.

Students at King's College London were left aghast after they got what they actually wanted.

KCL, meanwhile, has been left to weigh up the delights of having an extra £300k to play with against the humiliation of caving in to its own students.

KCL had been toying with the idea of dropping the C-word from the title, but after students expressed their outrage with the use of another C-word, the university decided its "number one" priority was student satisfaction.

It has yet to be confirmed whether this incident is a one-off anomaly, or whether other institutions will decide to follow suit, and similarly prioritise their students.

Stay tuned for updates.