They were looking for a job, and then they found a job. And heaven knows they’re miserable now.
A new spoof band called The Iain Duncan Smiths has decided to rework some Smiths classics with a mashup of Morrissey and the Tory Work and Pensions Secretary.
The group features a Mozza/IDS hybrid singing such hits as ‘This Balanced Plan’, ‘How Soon is NWO’ and ‘Big South Strikes Again’.
The group is the brainchild of Jonny Abrams, a prankster madrigal who is also the man behind a spoof UKIP musical ‘Farage Against The Machine’.
One track by The Iain Duncan Smiths, ‘Heaven Knows You’re Miserable Now’ includes the lines:
“I’m so happy with my place in the Cabinet, but heaven knows you’re miserable now/
“You went looking for a job, so we stopped your benefits. And heaven knows you’re miserable now.”
And ‘Big South Strikes Again’ starts with this:
“Sweetness, sweetness you know I wasn’t joking when I said that under my new scheme you won’t be fed/
“Sweetness, sweetness, you know I wasn’t joking when I said by rights you should be left to rot in bed.”
‘This Balanced Plan’ has the lines:
“You won’t go out tonight because you haven’t got a pound to spare/
“This man said, it’s gruesome that someone so handsome’s on welfare”
Of course, ‘This Charming Man’ was once one of David Cameron’s Desert Island Discs when he was making his name as a hip n happening young Tory leader.
The PM, who even took a tour round Salford Lads Club as part of a homage to the band, famously came under fire from guitarist Johnny Marr in 2010.
David Cameron, stop saying that you like The Smiths, no you don't. I forbid you to like it.— Johnny Marr (@Johnny_Marr) December 2, 2010
"I have now got both Johnny Marr and other members of the band saying I'm not able to listen to the Smiths," a defiant Cameron later told the BBC.
"When I've got the full set, even then I'm afraid I will go on listening to them."
It’s not known if IDS is a fan of The Smiths or even his new eponymous band. (He has a soft spot for Eminem, we're not making this up).
But while he may not reel around the fountain at the spoof band’s lyrics (he disagrees with his critics over foodbanks, benefits reform and can point to record employment), he does have a lively sense of gallows humour.
After all, he succeeded William Hague. And William, it was really nothing.