29/02/2016 08:29 GMT | Updated 25/02/2017 05:12 GMT

Dealing With Online Bullies - Lessons of Love and Kindness


"We rise by lifting others."

Lately there's been a few internet bullies and a few nasty attacks towards me. So far this last fortnight has been a tester - I've been told I'm an idiot, I'm a waste of space, I'm unauthentic, I've had cruel things said about loved ones, I've been told I'm too fat and then that I'm too skinny, that I'm too ugly, that I'm not a real woman, that my advice is bullshit, and that I'm a just another follower of the crowds - and the thing is this: I have no idea who the people were, these things randomly came from nowhere, I never provoked it, I never reacted, I never asked for their opinion on me, I simply chose to ignore it and delete it so it couldn't bring me or anyone else down. I took a moment and wished the individuals well, I sent them positive thoughts, and decided to learn and grow from it.

I cannot control what anyone thinks about me - I can simply show up to each moment and choose compassion and kindness and send people love when they most definitely need it.

Sometimes the Internet world of blogging and choosing to share as much info and knowledge as I can about my own life and experiences as well as the educational things I have studied can be tough, but doing this and providing as much for free online as is suitable to help others requires a lot of time, dedication and hours daily & often is a very financially difficult thing to pursue - but when you can help one person it is oh so rewarding. I'm committed to trying to make a difference and helping as many people as I can, and some internet bullies can't see the energy and effort put in and attack random people without knowing them, without regard for the fact there is a human on the other side of their message, and without love and kindness.

Bullying isn't the way in life - and reacting back with anger or spite only disrupts your own state of being. Yes it initially hurt and made me question my self, yes it got me down for a very short time, and yes I could have let it ruin my entire day, but by choosing to accept that the only person to control my feelings is myself, that the only person who determines my self-worth is me, that people sometimes don't like you, that people may lash out because of something else going on in their life and that they may be needing love or support themselves, or using moments like these that can serve as a way to grow and move forward for both the person on the receiving end and the person lashing out makes it easier to deal with.

Every day provides an opportunity for growth. Every day we can make choices that affect who we form ourselves to be as human beings in the future. By choosing wisely - by choosing compassion, love and acceptance when you feel challenged - you let yourself grow. By choosing to not take things personally, you deflect unnecessary negativity. By reacting in a positive way you may even change something for them and help them to change their negative behaviour.

In the words of Lao Tzu: "If you look to others for fulfillment,

you will never be fulfilled. If your happiness depends on money,

you will never be happy with yourself. Be content with what you

have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is

nothing lacking, the world belongs to you."

So to the Internet bullies: I'm happy with my life, I'm feeling confident about my looks and my body finally after so many years of self hate, torture, and depression, I will continue to smile and spread happiness, and I will share as much knowledge as I can with those wanting to hear it because I'm trying to make a difference in someone's life, I'm trying to help, I'm trying to make other people live their dreams and to feel happy and confident within themselves. And I want that for you too. If you don't like something about me or anyone else that's fine, don't like it, but don't lash out and attack people to try and bring them down. Please choose your words carefully, some people can't handle bullying and nobody should have to, some people have bad days and your words could really hurt someone. Instead reach out to someone, ask for a hug, go for a walk, or simple delete them from your social media feed instead of trying to upset them.

We should focus always on lifting others up which in turn lifts us up. We all have potential for growth, for change, and for unconditional love. We are all human, we all have feelings, we are all one.

Kindness wins. Compassion wins. Love wins.

"Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle,

and the life of the candle will not be shortened.

Happiness never decreases by being shared." ~ Buddha

I Love you all - Cat x

If you need some love and support pop over to my website of Facebook here.