12 Thoughts Mums Have About Sex After Giving Birth

Sorry, what?

After having a human come out of your body, the last thing that is on the agenda for many mums is having something put right back up there.

And while most know they will want to have sex again eventually, the idea of anything more physical than a hug is simply enough to make our toes curl right now.

Here are 13 thoughts mums have about sex after giving birth.

1. Convincing yourself everyone else was doing it straight away.

2. Being unable to think of anything you want to do in bed apart from sleep.

3. Reassuring your partner that the doctor definitely said six months, not six weeks, (you’re positive that’s what they said).

4. Being unable to get the mental image of labour out of your head.

5. Agreeing to try if you can keep it under 90 seconds long.

6. Thinking you are as dry as the Sahara desert.

7. Knowing that all the lube in the world isn’t going to solve this.

8. Needing good foreplay more than ever before.

9. Trying to maintain a poker face even though it feels like your insides are falling out.

10. Appreciating your partner wanting your body even though you don’t feel like you look your best.

11. Being interrupted halfway through when your boobs leak or smack them in the face.

12. Believing your baby has a sixth sense because they always know just went to wake up.