Making the leap from one child to two can seem pretty daunting – especially when you’ve got friends who have two kids and say “no more!” with a level of certainty that speaks volumes.
So, what do parents of two or more children want those thinking of expanding their brood to know? And how hard is it to switch from one child to managing two?
A stay-at-home dad of a 10-month-old recently asked the masses on Reddit what would make the transition from one kid to two a bit easier.
“Everyone says kid #2 is the hardest,” he said. “For those of you who have multiple kids, I want you to go back to that transitional period between your first and second child. Looking back, what are things you did that placed you in the best position possible for adjusting to kid #2?”
A very good question.
Here’s what people said...
Read books to your child to prepare them for a new baby
“We talked about the baby, mommy’s big tummy, and hyped up being a big brother for months,” said one parent in response to the post.
They also let their child watch Instagram reels of other kids meeting new baby siblings. “It helped give my toddler a fairly solid understanding of what was about to happen,” they added.
Carve out time for solo play with your child
Once the new baby has arrived, a parent of two young siblings advised others to carve out an hour and dedicate that time solely to their eldest each day. They added it went “a long way for our home’s emotional stability”. Noted.
Don’t put off the chores
When you’ve got two kids running circles around you, it can feel tempting to put off the chores – but parents warn it can all build up and become overwhelming if you don’t stay on top of it. So, when those toys need putting away after the kids are in bed, or the dishes need doing, the advice is simple: get it done.
Subscribe to meal kits
When juggling looking after a child and a new baby, some parents swear by meal delivery kits so they don’t have to think about what to cook that week. As one parent said: “They’ve been a huge life saver for us in this transition!!!”
Prep, prep, prep
A stay-at-home parent with two young children said before their husband goes to work, they will ensure their children’s outfits are picked out, bottles are washed and filled with water, formula powder is measured out and lunches for them and the older sibling are made.
It’s a hustle, but it “has made the chaos way more manageable,” they admitted.
Let it go
The same parent said letting go as much as possible has also helped. Before having kids, they would keep TV to a minimum, the house would be kept immaculate and toys would only be kept upstairs – but now things are a little more relaxed.
“Things will settle eventually, but I’ve got too many actually important things to care about than worrying about a messy floor or how much Toy Story has been watched in a day,” they said. “I need my energy and focus for keeping kids fed and clean(ish).”
Get your child used to both parents being hands on
If you’re in a two-parent household, it’s pretty normal for children to gravitate towards one parent in particular – especially when they’re younger. That’s why ensuring the older child is comfortable with both parents doing nap-time, bedtime and outings can make life a little bit easier when baby number two comes along and you have to tag-team more.
Don’t stress about the future
“If it works for now, it works,” said a parent in response to the post. They urged others to not stress about the future and how they’ll fix something that hasn’t even happened yet – for example, entering a sleep regression, or dropping naps, while looking after two kids.
Going with the flow is definitely a recurring theme, here.
But perhaps most importantly...
Try to enjoy it. It’ll be hard, and there’ll be times where you want to pull all your hair out, but chances are it will all be well worth it.