'The Secret Life Of 5-Year-Olds': Reasons Why Kids This Age Are Brilliant Humans

'I think I am the most interesting person here.'

Watching kids interact with other kids is fascinating. Fact.

That’s exactly why Channel 4’s ‘The Secret Life Of 5-Year-Olds’ is so addictive, where cameras follow a group of kids meeting each other for the first time.

This season covers them making friends, practising their newly acquired social skills and seeing if they can resist a chocolate fountain (erm, we couldn’t).

And it also reminded us what brilliant humans these five-year-olds are.

Channel 4

We’ve picked five moments from the show that prove these kids are the best.

They’re finding their competitive streak.

When Ellie walks into the classroom for the first time and meets her fellow classmate Jude, it’s not long before she decides to do the splits on the floor.

Of course when she does it, Jude wants to try it too.

“I can do the splits too,” he says, pretending it doesn’t hurt.

They come out with the most hilarious things.

This is almost a given, but some of the most hilarious snippets include the kids thinking being a grown up includes “doing all the washing up”, “going to bed early” and being the optimum age of 52.

Jude also comes out with “I might be the most interesting person here!” then proceeds to tell the group he likes the words “interesting, interest, investigate, dysfunctional and dictionary.” Because, why not?

And one of our personal favourites: “I want to be a vet Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday and the Queen Saturday and Sunday.”


They start thinking about relationships.

As Dr Elizabeth Kilney says on the show, five-year-olds are at the stage where they play being grown up without the responsibility or reality - and that of course includes relationships.

The show sees a budding romance between two of the children - Jude and Ellie.

“I’m going to marry you actually,” Ellie tells Jude. “Your hair is so fluffy I love fluffy hair it’s all snuggly like a pillow.”

It doesn’t take Jude long to come around.

“Are you going to be in love with me?” he asks. “Shall we kiss yet?”

Ellie replies: “No not yet, only when we get married!”.


They’re inclusive.

One of the children on the show is Daisy, who has Spastic Quadriplegic Cerebral Palsy and has to use a wheelchair.

Although Daisy looks different to the other children, they don’t shy away but rather ask questions instead (”Daisy, are those knee protectors?” and “Does she have a disability?”).

Daisy can’t play on the playground equipment because of her wheelchair, so Jude takes her around the garden and Ellie May sits in the garden shed with her.

When she needs to go Ellie May asks the others: “I need someone to keep Daisy company while I’m gone!”.

They’re vocal about what they want

... and that can sometimes cause arguments.

On the show there is snatching, some hitting, arguments and pushing, because one boy, named Phoenix, had chocolates that Jude wanted.

There is a lot of screaming, but thankfully they resolve their differences without any adult intervention.

The Secret Life of 5 Year Olds’ airs on Channel 4 at 8pm on Tuesday 29 November.

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