Right now, you're probably casting all sorts of different aspersions on me. Who does this guy think he is? Is he a polygamist? Is he looking for trouble? Do these poor women know? Just by reading the title, you're judging me. I dare you not too.
Hard isn't it? I should probably clear a few things up. For starters, I'm definitely not a polygamist. Growing up in a divorced parental background, I know how painful relationships can be and I'm not about to go and start upsetting anyone at the moment. You grow up pretty much determined to make every relationship work. So don't worry. I'm also not rich enough to keep that many girlfriends on the go. And cheating is totally not a cool thing to do. If you are currently cheating, go and slap yourself with a big wet fish and think about what you're doing. Actually, carry on reading this first and then go and slap yourself.
I'll admit, I've played you. It's a hell of a title isn't it? And it just chimes of Eastenders or Corrie doesn't it? And what do I mean 'I've played you'? Well I've managed to get you to read this far down the page haven't I?
So what exactly am I rambling on about? Why risk the anger of a lot of people for just a miniscule piece of journalism? Well, I wanted to show you or even remind you of how powerful Love can be. What springs to mind when I say Love? Do you see red roses? Do you feel the warmth of holding hands with your sweetheart underneath a setting apricot sky? Does the incredibly hot guy or girl down the gym spring to mind? Or maybe church bells and a flurry of confetti? Sex? We could be here all day but what about empathy, kindness, generosity, helpfulness or friendship?
I love the feeling of looking after people, putting on the kettle for a brew with a friend and offering them a chocolate. I love reading my friend's writing and reassuring them that they're an excellent writer. (I'm not just saying that by the way, they are pretty damn awesome and way better than me). I love helping to pack a friend's car for a journey home because I know they'd struggle by themselves. I love the feeling of worrying about them because I care for them and wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything happened to them. That's the kind of love I'm talking about.
And it's a powerful thing too. If you help someone out, not only will it make your friendship better, but they'll help others too. A bit like the ripples in a gentle pool of water. You start the initial splash, but the ripples carry on for quite a while. And just think how cool that would be if the entire world rippled with love and kindness. These things aren't just for Christmas you know. Imagine the young boy fighting in IS, remembering his favourite dish that only his mum could make. What if he gave up fighting to go back to her? What if, over the pond, Herr Fart was actually a bit nicer? That's a scary thought isn't it? But imagine if he gave up his quest for presidency to go and work as a voluntary aid worker in a third world country, using his millions for charity. (Hint Hint) I don't think he was listening do you?
To answer the question in my intro of 'Do these poor women know?' My answer is I should hope so! There's my Mum, my grandmas, my godmum, my girlfriend and girl-friends. I love the feeling from just spending time with them and helping them. Even if it's as small a thing as washing up after a curry and movie night or making another cup of coffee.
So go on, try it! Unless you're a cheater of course, in which case I hope you have your fish ready.