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Why the New Matt Is No Matt

The judges loved Matt. He was a favourite from the start. Even at the audition stage he seemed like a shoo-in. At the end, he turned out to be the irresistible package. With his genuinely unique falsetto voice, he was a worthy winner with 44.61% of the public vote. Plus, he had the added advantage of having a name his mentor could correctly pronounce.

Yes, there's no doubt about it; the boy done good. The only trouble is that he won in 2010 when 20 million tuned in to watch his victory and Louis constantly referred to that season's Honey G as WAGner instead of Vagner. No great surprise there since as far as I'm concerned, the cute cuddly Irishman has always come across as a bit of a VANker.

This, of course, was also the year when the runners up were Rebecca Ferguson (I'm sure I wasn't the only one who when they went to see Mission Impossible - Rogue Nation thought to themselves: "Oh, she did well for herself") and some boy band called One Direction. Not absolutely definite what happened to them. From the best of my recollection, I think they went on to have a couple of hits (100 number ones around the world) and sell a few records (over 70 million) before taking an extended hiatus at the start of 2016.

Anyway, now another Matt has stepped up to the X Factor plate - a plate from which, let's face it, only one man ever eats a hearty meal - and you can't help wondering whether the writing's on the wall for Mr. Terry, despite the fact that he did do a pretty good karaoke version of it in Movie Week. Just not quite good enough for Sam Smith to tip up and perform alongside him come the final. Thereby leaving Matt MK 11 to duet with a female singer who travelled all of six feet to be there on the night. Considering the effort and planning that must have involved, it's a minor miracle Nicole made it at all.

Matt Cardle, in case you needed reminding because you were 10 years old at the time and were therefore tucked up in bed when the show aired, became the champ in series 7 when the contest was still worth winning, viewers genuinely cared about who walked off with the crown and the contestant's mentors weren't so desperate to boost their own career that they'd have swum through an ocean of Muller toffee yogurt to be on stage with their act.

Cardle's winner's single, When We Collide, went on to sell 1 million copies, making it the fourth single by an X Factor contestant to have done so. Although perhaps inevitably, his relationship quickly soured with Syco and Columbia who jointly signed him and he parted company with them.

Of all the male artists who have won the TV talent show, Matt C. always seemed like the genuine article; a singer/ songwriter who was destined to be in the music business for the long haul. His collaborative release, Loving You, with Mel C. certainly hinted at some sort of longevity. Sadly, this didn't turn out to be the case and while a new album is promised for 2017, if it does actually get released, it's doubtful that it will set the charts alight and reignite his career.

So for the time being, we're left with the new pop pretender and his Christmas offering titled: When Christmas Comes Around. Much is being made of the fact that it's a new festive tune. This gives it a small window of opportunity to sell like hot chestnuts before being stored away with the lights and decorations, only to be brought out again next year and the year after that and the year after that and for all christmases evermore.

On the first few listens, this is no Merry Christmas Everybody, Last Christmas or Fairytale of New York. Co-written by Ed Sheeran whose appeal along with Adele and a host of other boring balladeers continues to baffle, this is more drear than I for one can bear, which unquestionably means that it will be a massive hit and sell by the bucketload, making all involved a great deal of money.

Indeed, i wouldn't be surprised to see Mr Sheeran knighted for real in the New Years Honours list for services to Soporific Hypnosis and his role in reducing us all to a such a catatonic state that we forget and ignore all the other crap that's currently going on around us and affecting society.

As for any other Matt out there who's an aspiring singer and is considering auditioning for next year's X Factor, they may wish to reconsider their options. Or at least think about changing their name - maybe to something a tad more unpronounceable. After all, it probably won't do Sara/ Zara (love her homewares)/Saara any harm.

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