07/01/2014 11:59 GMT | Updated 09/03/2014 05:59 GMT

Ten Things You Need to Know Before You Quit Your January Diet

The first week of the new-year is traditionally a time when we all resolve to lose 10 pounds, go running every day and abstain from booze, fags and all other vices until daffodils appear.

The second week of January is when we decide that we're all going to die anyway, so we might as well have some fun in the time we have left.

Based on years of experience I can tell you, categorically, that new years resolutions never work, so this year, forget sacrifice, and instead, focus on enhancing an aspect of your life that will make you even happier than chocolate and Pomerol...

1. Kick the year off in style by doing The Miracle Sex Diet, a 24 hour fast and feast which will positively revolutionise your relationship with food and sex.

2. Be more shellfish. Oysters, clams, and scallops contain compounds that raise testosterone and estrogen levels. They are also an excellent source of zinc which improves immunity, aids blood flow and is essential for sperm creation. Zinc is especially important for men because of it's role in maintaining prostate health, testosterone levels and overall sexual health.

3. Yo Sushi. Oily Fish such as salmon, tuna, trout and mackerel contain heart-healthy omega-3 fatty acids which prevent the build up of plaque around the arteries. They also contain the amino acid L-arginine, which is converted into nitric oxide and is critical for erections and female sexual function.

4. Go nuts. And Seeds. Sprinkle them on cereal, salads and rice to boost levels of zinc and L-arginine. Walnuts are particulalry rich in omega-3, and almonds contain zinc, selenium, and vitamin E. Selenium aids fertility and vitamin E promotes heart health.

5. Keep it green. Spinach is a potent source of magnesium which helps dilate blood vessels. Spinach, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, kale, cabbage, Swiss chard, and bok choy are also great sources of folate. In a Harvard University study of 46,000 men, those who consumed the most folate daily were 30% less likely to develop Peripheral Arterial Disease.

6. Eat an apple a day. Apples are a primary source of Vitamin C and Quercetin, a powerful antioxidant that benefits circulation and helps to control symptoms of prostatitis and interstitial cystitis (IC). Quercitin is also found in onions, black tea, blueberries and cranberries.

7. Tuck in to a testicle tree. The Aztecs, believed avocados or 'ahuacatl' were such a powerful sexual stimulant that virgin women were forbidden to leave their houses during their harvest. Avocados are a complete superfood: rich in vitamin E, potassium, folate and vitamin B6, they are a great source of heart-healthy monounsaturated fats.

8. Get Fruity. Strawberries and raspberries are rich in antioxidants and vitamin C and both fruits have high levels of zinc in their seeds. Try pouring melted dark chocolate over fresh or frozen berries. Dark chocolate contains phenylethylamine (PEA), which releases the same mood-altering endorphins that flood our bodies during sex and intensify feelings of attraction.

9. Lively up yourself. Anything that is good for your heart is even better for your sex life. Men with heart disease are twice as likely to have erectile dysfunction, so keeping fit is a no-brainer. Exercise burns calories, improves sexual stamina and boosts libido in both men and women.

10. Rev up your mojo with a watermelon margarita. Watermelon is low in calories, but high in the phytonutrients lycopene, citrulline, and beta-carotene which have properties similar to Viagra. Try scooping out the flesh of a whole melon, chopping it into small chunks and freezing it. When you are ready to party, toss a couple of handfuls of the frozen flesh into a blender with some fresh strawberries, a little sugar, lemon juice and a decent splash of vodka. Delish.