Here we've had mince pies in the shops with a pre-Christmas sell by date, since September and now we've jumped straight to Black Friday. Except we haven't even copied it properly. This random excuse to increase sales has been going on for weeks in advance, it's been repurposed by some retailers as 'black ticket' sales, whatever that's supposed to mean
I'm far from sorted when it comes to my thoughts about this whole political situation - my brain starts to shut down when I think too much about the coming apocalypse - but one thing is clear to me. We're on the edge of something monumental. And like that rollercoaster into Bank, it may well leave you feeling nauseous...
Peace in Cyprus, has the opportunity to show the world that there is another way. We don't always have to point fingers and seek out a scapegoat. Even where there is little hope, and after 42 years, many Cypriots had lost hope, with determination and drive, anything is possible. I wish the leaders and those involved in the final stages of these peace talks endless luck. If they are successful, it will not only mean a great deal to my family and fellow Cypriots, it will also mean a lot to a world that at times feels like it has lost all hope.
It is still a great country, as a close friend reminded me recently. I can vouch for that. But here's the thing: greatness comes with an admission of mistakes, a campaign to make reparation and the willingness to remember, if only for the purpose of avoiding previous mistakes. Moving forward, politics has to be about keeping America great. That's the spirit!
While we have no say in who becomes President of the United States and we definitely can't do anything to change it, we do have a choice in how we treat others. Neither gender nor race, sexuality or anything else for that matter should determine how we treat one another. Our differences should unite not divide us and to end as I began, with the words of Hillary Clinton, "love trumps hate."
I had to take a deep breath last night when a work colleague of mine - a young, gay man - called me over on my break because he wanted to talk about Donald Trump. "Isn't it exciting?" he said, "Trump is something completely different, I'd probably have voted for him. He isn't a politician, he's something new."
So today, I am feeling a little bit more positive in knowing that even though America may not be run by a man I admire or look up to, or who shares the same values as me - there's still a lot of good in my forever wonderful country, and that will never change. So thanks America, for forever being wonderful no matter what the outcome.
Time was when a newly elected head of state got a "honeymoon period"; a time to ride on the wave of national enthusiasm and renewal. With an electorate sick to the back teeth of the last lot, you got to capitalise on that positivity and get some of the unpleasant stuff done while people still like you. Not this time. In this age, the post-dialup age, your honeymoon period lasts about as long as a Snapchat. If that.
An avalanche of post-mortem election analysis is being unleashed. However, much of it seems to operate in a vacuum. There are various critiques of Trump. He may certainly be appalling and objectionable but there is a huge amount of hypocrisy at play here, which needs to be unmasked. Let's take the points one by one.
Hillary Rodham Clinton's concession speech was everything that diplomacy should be - I should stop typing, turn off my computer and sulk somewhere else because if she can pull herself together, slap on mascara and tell America, and the world, to keep an open mind then I have no place to be playing a violin.
As twisted as it may seem, a Trump victory is actually a victory for democracy. People can truly decide to rise above the expectations of their friends, society, other countries, etc.' and vote with their hearts for who they want, not caring how the media has painted him. Whether they chose fear over progress or not, you can't take away that the results show Democracy as the true winner.
I'm no fan of Donald Trump and I think it's sad that these were the two best candidates the Republicans and Democrats had to offer. However, personal feelings aside, looking at the conversations taking place on social media and the stories that have dominated the alternative news, there seem to be a number of underlying reasons for a Trump victory.