Now most of us would be embarrassed to admit to feeling jealous. And most of the time, we wouldn't even realise that we're feeling jealous. But jealousy happens to the best of us, and when it does, it just creeps in, eats away at us and tastes sour. It makes us overreact, misinterpret and assume things. Simply put, jealousy is toxic; it doesn't look good or feel good.
It's true that sometimes friendships can be kind of lopsided. One friend might have an ongoing issue and needs some support for a while. Perhaps for a very long while. And you're doing all the giving and that friend is doing all the receiving. But then there are times it works the other way and you're on the receiving end for a while.
At some time or another we've all experienced our share of emotional hurt. And often when we're hurt, we dump our feelings on others or speak harshly. But this doesn't always work. Getting stuck with the hurt and moping around feeling sorry for ourselves also doesn't work. Suppressing hurt also doesn't work. Why?
Picking a therapist can seem like a daunting and time-consuming task. It's hard enough to get yourself to therapy when you need it (it's like going to the dentist for some people), but to 'shop around' for the right therapist can make many people quit, or settle for the first one they find, even if it's not the right fit.
I once saved two lives in one night. A friend's who I'd only known a couple weeks and my very own. I was going through an incredibly dark period; I thought life wasn't worth living and that I had no purpose. Yet, I saw the terrible hurt in my friend's eyes and decided I was going to do something about it.
Those changes will empower you. Those words will put you back in control of your life. There isn't a nameless "something" out there trying to keep you from being able to do something; it's right there inside yourself in that horrible little "C" word. Only you can make it disappear and put yourself back in the driver's seat.
Ego enables us to see shortcomings and weaknesses in others, but not in ourselves. And when we do see our weaknesses, ego hides them and claims to the world that we have none. How do you know when your ego is at work? If you feel insulted, if a criticism hurts, if you get defensive, lose confidence.... it's your ego reacting!