Are you really? You're really obsessed with unicorns/pirates/ninjas/cheese/duck egg blue? You can't sleep without thinking of these things? You wake up and the first thing on your mind is unicorns/wasabi peas/whatever the f***? Then you're an idiot, what's more you're not even a special idiot.
Unicorns, the latest trend from Silicon Valley, are private companies with a valuation of over $1 billion. A year ago, everyone aspired to be one, but the trend is cooling somewhat, and the voices of caution are starting to be heard.
I know what you're thinking. Forget these idiots. But I cannot let lie accusations that I am somehow joyless. The universe deserves the truth: that science and skepticism offer a magic and happiness more profound than any unicorn ever could.