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Why Are We All So Angry These Days?

Posted: 24/01/2013 23:00

Road rage, car rage, plane rage... there seems to be a rage for everything these days! Rarely a week goes by without some report in the media about someone who has 'lost it' as the red mist descended. There are angry people in supermarkets (trolley rage), on buses, in cinemas, at restaurants... Is nowhere safe anymore from our anger? How and why did we become such an Angry Nation?

I have studied anger for many years and penned two books on the topic; the latest, Managing Anger (Hodder and Stoughton) out this month. I believe that we are getting angrier as a nation - that we are more likely than ever before to both feel angry and to express our anger. This is despite the increasing 'zero tolerance' exhibited in many workplaces and organisations that remind us that 'abuse towards staff will not be tolerated.' So, what's going on?

The reasons for our increasing rage are, in my view, twofold; on the one hand our expectations have risen steadily and on the other hand, so have our stress levels. Our raised expectations mean that we, as a society, have much higher expectations of our world; we believe we have the right to expect things to go well, indeed, to be perfect. Part of this raised expectation is fed by the 'customer charter' culture which has mushroomed over the past decade; this is a charter for our 'rights' and leads us to have high expectations that we receive superlative service in all aspects of our life. When, as is inevitable, reality falls short of these expectations, we feel that we have the right to get angry about it. Steak not cooked to perfection? Someone eating popcorn noisily in the cinema? We have the right to get annoyed and demand redress - immediately!

At the same time that we have become more demanding as a nation, we are also living a more frenetic and frantic pace of life, which means our stress levels are raised. This raised stress means that our tolerance for things going wrong is dramatically reduced. Things that go wrong often appear to conspire to stop us achieving some objective whether that be work or pleasure-based. The customer taking too long in front of us is stopping us do our shopping quickly, the staff member who won't give us a refund is stopping us getting access to the justice we think we deserve, and the colleague who is interrupting us with minor queries is stopping us get our work done. Because of our stress levels, our tolerance for such obstacles is low....and we get angry. This combination of raised expectations and stress levels gives rise to the 'angry personality'; and there seem to be more Mr and Ms Angrys about these days.

The things that make us angry tend to fall into a small range of categories; things that frustrate us and stop us reaching our goals, unmet expectations, perceived injustice or abuse. Our tolerance for all of these is likely to be low when are stress levels are high, and we feel entitled not only to feel angry, but to express that anger when we feel that these rights have been violated.

What, then, can we do to become calmer and to take life's frustrations more easily in our stride? Clearly, we need to lower our expectations and not only accept, but expect that not everything will go as it 'should'. This doesn't mean we have to put up with shoddy service, but that we can be able to deal more calmly with things when they go wrong. Lowering our general stress levels will also mean that we can tolerate everyday disappointments better and not fly off the handle at relatively minor frustrations.

So, don't get mad, get even (tempered)! Your health (and people around you) will thank you for it!

Also on HuffPost UK Lifestyle:

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  • Bring Your Dog To Work

    A recent study in the <em>International Journal of Workplace Health Management</em> showed that <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/04/01/bringing-dog-to-work-stress_n_1391420.html" target="_hplink">bringing your dog to work</a> could help to lower office stress and boost employee satisfaction. "Pet presence may serve as a low-cost, wellness intervention readily available to many organizations and may enhance organizational satisfaction and perceptions of support," study researcher Randolph T. Barker, Ph.D., a professor of management at Virginia Commonwealth University, said in a statement. "Of course, it is important to have policies in place to ensure only friendly, clean and well-behaved pets are present in the workplace." The study, which looked at the pet-friendly company Replacements, Ltd., showed that employees who brought their dogs in to work experienced <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/04/01/bringing-dog-to-work-stress_n_1391420.html" target="_hplink">decreases in stress</a> throughout the work day. Meanwhile, self-reported stress <em>increased</em> for people who didn't bring their dogs, and for those who don't have dogs.

  • Laugh It Up

    If you're feeling particularly stressed, perhaps it's time to take a quick YouTube break. A small 1989 study in the <em>American Journal of the Medical Sciences</em> showed that<a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/2556917" target="_hplink"> "mirthful laughter"</a> is linked with lower blood levels of the stress hormone cortisol. The Mayo Clinic reported that laughter also promotes <a href="http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/stress-relief/SR00034" target="_hplink">endorphin release</a> in the brain and relaxes the muscles, which are all key for stress relief.

  • Grab A Shovel And Some Seeds

    Caregiving is extremely stressful, but a 2008 survey showed that gardening may help to reduce stress among caregivers. The survey, by BHG.com, showed that 60 percent of caregivers feel <a href="http://www.alz.org/national/documents/release_110308_garden.pdf" target="_hplink">relaxed when they garden</a>, the Alzheimer's Association reported. And, Health.com reported on a Netherlands study, suggesting that gardening can help to <a href="http://www.health.com/health/article/0,,20507878_2,00.html" target="_hplink">lower cortisol levels</a> and boost mood among people who had just finished a stressful task. That's because doing something that requires "involuntary attention" -- like sitting back and enjoying nature -- helps to replenish ourselves, Health.com reported.

  • Crack Open A Book

    Just <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/5070874/Reading-can-help-reduce-stress.html" target="_hplink">six minutes of reading</a> is enough to help you de-stress, the <em>Telegraph</em> reported. The study, which was sponsored by Galaxy chocolate, suggested that <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/5070874/Reading-can-help-reduce-stress.html" target="_hplink">reading was linked with a slower heart rate</a> and muscle relaxation. Drinking tea or coffee, listening to music and taking a walk also seemed to help lower stress, according to the <em>Telegraph</em>.

  • Call Mom

    Even if she's not there in person, a call to mom can help lower stress. <em>Scientific American</em> reported on a study in the journal <em>Proceedings of the Royal Society B</em> showing that young girls who <a href="http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/observations/2010/05/11/a-phone-call-from-mom-reduces-stress-as-well-as-a-hug/" target="_hplink">talked to their mothers on the phone</a> after completing stressful tasks had decreased cortisol (the stress hormone) in their saliva, and increased oxytocin levels (the bonding hormone). The girls who talked to their mothers on the phone had <a href="http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/observations/2010/05/11/a-phone-call-from-mom-reduces-stress-as-well-as-a-hug/" target="_hplink">decreased cortisol</a> and increased oxytocin levels compared with young girls who weren't allowed to contact their mothers at all, <em>Scientific American</em> reported -- girls who hugged their moms in person had a similar reaction to the phone group.

  • Eat Some Chocolate

    Dark chocolate doesn't only have health benefits for the heart -- eating it can also help to <a href="http://www.livescience.com/7974-chocolate-reduces-stress-study-finds.html" target="_hplink">lower stress</a>. LiveScience reported on a study illustrating that eating 1.4 ounces of <a href="http://www.livescience.com/7974-chocolate-reduces-stress-study-finds.html" target="_hplink">dark chocolate</a> a day for a two-week period is linked with decreased levels of the stress hormone cortisol. That study was published in 2009 in the journal <em>Proteome Research</em>. (But of course, chocolate still contains sugar and lots of calories, so make sure you're eating the chocolate in moderation!)

  • Gossip

    Gossip may not be viewed as socially "good," but it <em>might</em> have benefits in relieving stress. Researchers from the University of California, Berkeley, found that <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/17/gossip-stress-exploitation-heart-rate_n_1211207.html" target="_hplink">gossiping can actually lower stress</a>, stop exploitation of others and police others' bad behavior. "Spreading information about the person whom they had seen behave badly tended to <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/17/gossip-stress-exploitation-heart-rate_n_1211207.html" target="_hplink">make people feel better</a>, quieting the frustration that drove their gossip," study researcher Robb Willer, a social psychologist at UC Berkeley, said in a statement. Willer's research was published this year in the <em>Journal of Personality and Social Psychology</em>. So if something's bothering you, go ahead and gab -- but just make sure you move on so you don't dwell on the negative emotions!

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Road rage, car rage, plane rage... there seems to be a rage for everything these days! Rarely a week goes by without some report in the media about someone who has 'lost it' as the red mist descended...
Road rage, car rage, plane rage... there seems to be a rage for everything these days! Rarely a week goes by without some report in the media about someone who has 'lost it' as the red mist descended...
 
 
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Reith
what's a micro-bio?
12:01 AM on 01/28/2013
We're angry because most people are under stress. They entered society thinking a family was a good idea. Now they all have to work to provide for children. Your family receives less attention than work (and you quarrel with your partner to let off steam because you daren't appear contentious at work). Work for most is a soul destroying passsage of clock-watching time. Then they drive to and from work and suffer traffic jams, heat, need a pee but the tailback is 3 miles and you're never going to make it. Then there's money. Finance, debts. Energy bills going up by more than 10%/year. Food going up 6% this year. And when you buy food you really don't know what's in it.

I mean, what do people really have to live for? Once upon a time, those paternal organisations gave you a job for life. You were a trainee middle-ager and could see progress toward your "arrival". Now people take out a 25 year home loan when they can't even guarantee having a job next week. Life is hardly fun unless you keep slim on nervous energy.

But please, if you do have kids, look on them as the very real sharing of you and your partner. You created them. Love them, Cherish them and support them all you can.
06:33 PM on 01/27/2013
It's more a case of being scared for me and many who see the future as something to fear. Fewer jobs paying living wages whilst hours are cut but the essentials continue to cost more and the Government keeps playing one section of society off against another(Divide and Rule)rents going up, gas and electric too expensive for many and often they choose between eating or heating.Introduction of new ways to make it difficult to live often in homes you have for years and gave security such as the bedroom tax and often there are no smaller properties to downsize to.

Then they try to take off the disadvantaged who need to take State help...most don't wish to and the offficial statistics office says that fraud is extremely small and not as the media and politicians portray but say it often enough...most who claim are working.

Yet now we have the unemployed, the sick, the disabled, carers all being tarred as wasters, scroungers and other choice words...

Meanwhile the amount of foodbanks opening and being needed increases. More being asked of charities and churches.

The UK is no longer a country that I recognise nor like anymore...and when they tell me we are living longer I ask what is the point if your worry and stress is greater and the care we probably require as we age is poor as it is for many.
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02:41 PM on 01/27/2013
As a student of Sociology, I hate to say this, but.....
I actually think a lot of this is just down to chance, the brain's structure, neurological differences. Because I have never been an angry person. I don't think anyone I know has seen me properly loose my temper as an adult. It just isn't me- I'm not better, or virtuous, it just doesn't really happen. the things that make me angry are often political, but more in terms of an inner anger/passion.
The only thing that really seems to make me lose it is fiddly tasks that go wrong.
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Reith
what's a micro-bio?
12:02 AM on 01/28/2013
Do you have a family and responsibility for a home; earning money to pay all the bills?
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08:08 AM on 01/28/2013
No, I don't.  I can only imagine how stressful that would sometimes become. 
11:31 AM on 01/27/2013
I am not angry, and I'll punch anybody who suggests otherwise....
08:17 AM on 01/27/2013
Have you been out of the country? On another planet perhaps? Surely your question is nowhere near deep enough as witnessed by your rather anodyne analysis and solution. It is not that our raised expectations are frustrated at all. It is because life has just become too darned hard for most people - working hard to scrape a living in the face of a government that cares not one whit, trying to raise a family under the constant pressure of the highly "connected" society we have nowadays, finding that each time we make a little progress - a step forward - we are driven backwards two steps by some new complication, a tax hike or another opressive and depressing "rule" supposedly instigated to improve matters but actually, usually worsten them.
What you are talking about are symptoms, not causes and like most goverment actions treating symptoms never cures the disease!
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Carol Hoousendove
09:24 PM on 01/26/2013
What makes me angry is crooks like the ones on 12/12/12 Why are all Sandy victims without heat shelter. WHERE IS THE MONEY MILLIONS COLLECTED THIS MAKES ME ANGRY.
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wincanton man
03:07 PM on 01/26/2013
A lot of people are angry because they have a stong ethos of right and wrong but see this apparently being mocked by the judiciary . People can remove politicians by use of the vote, or at the very least get some personal satisfaction by their use of the vote, but have no powers of redress against the judiciary.
The case of the Algerian terror suspect being allowed to remain in the UK because of fears he may commit suicide if returned to Algeria is a classic case. The decision not to deport him, flies in the face of common sense, common decency and the core of what most people perceive as being right. People are angry because they have no say or influence in decisions made by others who appear at best to be irrational or inept and at worst unhinged.
01:55 PM on 01/26/2013
I think we are angry because we can all see where the governments are going wrong and they won't listen to those on the ground who have more common sense. Similarly managers - they don't like to think that the workers know more than they do
12:40 PM on 01/26/2013
Crap Tory government is to blame.
10:34 AM on 01/26/2013
Too many people crammed together like rats, no space to breath and it will only get worse in overcrowded Britian. Strange how the Victorians thought the maximum number of people this island could support in comfort was 5 million.....we're now heading towards 70 million thanks to various government policies . Think the Victorians could teach us a thing or two
10:44 PM on 01/26/2013
And thankls to women who believe babies enrich their lives....then shortly after realize it was a bad idea.....
Randybostonterrier
Calling Republicans down on their BS
03:42 PM on 01/27/2013
Wow compared to the US, Britain is so small and when immigrants go there it must really hurt. One day when I retired, I'd like to move out to the desert SW in the U.S. and escape people and get some solitary piece of mind.
06:16 PM on 01/27/2013
Like to join you there matey...... Oops defeats the purpose!!!
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09:37 AM on 01/26/2013
mabe things are getting a little to complicated..?...i think the population were a lot happier in simple times.when they had more money maybe & wasent struggling as much..hope fully its just a whim that will soon pass...?...if not just chill n sit back n roll a big 5....ha ha..go out spread the word & smile at fellow man...?...ha ha..X
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09:25 AM on 01/26/2013
its because we all dont smoke enough skunk...?....
05:05 PM on 01/26/2013
I'd smoke to that if it was legal...
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06:44 PM on 01/26/2013
heloo Mr healey been out of my tree most of the day saying hi 2 every peeps & laughin me nut off...??..hope u had a good crimbo dude...x...
08:42 AM on 01/26/2013
it all boils down to unscrupulous businesses trying to rip us all off, with phony promotions, pressure sales, prices going up constantly, no value for money anymore, greed greed greed, dog eat dog world, so glad i was born in fifties, feel sorry for the youth of today, no one is exempt from the low level practices companies employ to achieve targets and what makes me sick is they target the older people, i love to name and shame them
11:53 PM on 01/26/2013
ha ha, having bad day when i wrote that but thanks for advice apperset
01:38 AM on 01/26/2013
Why are we so angry these days? It's people asking stupid questions that gets me going!
07:04 PM on 01/26/2013
...and me!
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John Mailey
09:53 PM on 01/26/2013
Why?
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coady12
10:58 PM on 01/25/2013
why are people so angry these days? Read your local paper